[Roleplay - Drop-in] GET THAT PIZZA!: REBAKED

[Florien]

Ambulance Chasers Florien and Florian, who sue her for malpractice! Her insurance premiums soar, and she's forced to auction off the Pizza to pay them, which Florien and Florian then buy for a mere pittance.

[awe921]

'''AWE''' casts '''WAVE ARTIFICE'''.

Florien and Florian turns around to see that Awe has become... rather strange-looking to say the least. He looks as if he was made out of clay, which his erratic movement soon proves as he casts a spell with casting so trippy that if the spell wasn't an attacking one, Awe could've picked the pizza up from the sheer confusion he inflicted on the Florie/ans.

Unfortunately, it is an offensive spell, so the Florie/ans are quickly blown into pieces by the attack whose animation realistically shouldn't be an attack but is so weird enough that you forget to consider such.

Awe takes the pizza as loot, jumps up and starts dashing throughout the air.

[Superjohn 2.0]

He then gets blasted by Superjohn s satellite laser, turning him to dust(do do do, another one bites the dust). He then takes the pizza and flies off with his rocket powered feet.

[madface7]

Mad gets out a rocket launcher, rocket jumps toward Superjohn, and cracks him with her whip, dealing a critical hit and causing Superjohn to drop out of midair and die, allowing Mad to take the now airborne pizza.

She rocket jumps onto a small wooden tower, when suddenly...

[Whistle]

Whistle starts falling past Mad. She falls further down, then opens her parachute, onto which Mad lands, rolls off, and drops the pizza. Whistle cuts her chute and falls for it, but...

[josh6243]

Commander Yammark steals the pizza mid-air and takes another slice. For her hubris, she gets lariated in the face by ..

[Superjohn 2.0]

SUPERJOHN HITS YAMMARK WITH THE CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL! 1 2 3 JOHN WINS THE PIZZA MY GOD!


but wait someone approaches from behind john! It's....

[madface7]

John.

Could it be a clone, perhaps?

...no, it's just a mirror. A yellow fist smashes through the mirror and grabs the pizza, with bits of mirror shards flying into John's skin and causing him to bleed out.

Madface8, now with the pizza, jumps into a hole which leads to the Cave of the Mole-Men. She dons a Mole-Man disguise to blend in, while keeping the pizza close by.

[Cassie]

then libre sends the mole-men out of their caves with RESONANT WAIL, leaving Mad open to lose Pizza, out of shock of seeing a corpse-mannequin thing wearing Libre's skin nabbing the Pizza from her. She's not sure if that was actually Libre, even though he knows himself.

[wingedcatgirl]

Suddenly, the skeleton of a Miqo'te tackles Libre, shrieking something about "give it back, damn you!" A Big Ball Of Violence ensues.

After a few moments, Sylvi emerges triumphant, her skin retrieved and re-equipped. She then turns to the pizza --

-- it's gone! Someone took it already?

[madface7]

M8 took it, and is standing there with a gun to Libre's head.

"My name. Is not. Mad."

She shoots Libre and, with Sylvi distracted by the corpse, runs off with the pizza.

[Cassie]

Libre is sickened over the feeling of being blown out of the head, and starts wailing like mad, trapping M8 inbetween the cave rocks. He re-steals Sylvi's skin, then the Pizza, then turns M8 into mush in a failed attempt to steal her skin.

"Why the fuck is Sylvi so...fleshless?"

[Whistle]

Turns out that skin was Whistle in disguise, who encases Libre in herself and runs off with the pizza, when...

[Florien]

Wow. I thought we were the serial killers here.

Lots of skin-theft these days.

Lots of skin-theft.

Shortly thereafter, Florien and Florian start a skin insurance company with a note in incredibly fine print that they only pay out for people's skins being specifically removed by a laser. They collect enormous premiums and pay out nothing, then immediately dissolve the company so no one who gets skin stripped by a laser can make a claim anyway. With the funds received, they sponsor coups in many small nations, lowering the number of worldwide democracies. Resultantly, as democracies become fewer and fewer, the democratic peace stops being a thing. The world plunges once more into an essentially unending war, as it was back in the 1500s and earlier. Subsequently, this overly complex plan leads to Whistle being poisoned by a corporate-police-state-owned water system with terrible safety standards. Florien and Florian, who used the rest of the fortune to take control of the corporate-police-state's police, arrive on the scene and claim the Pizza as the corporate cut of the will.

[Cassie]

Suddenly the Flories get snatched and dragged to a theatre, one occupied with a bunch of freak-ass animatronics. Hell, some of them don't look like anything you'd find in stuff like FNaF or Chuck E' Cheese!

The curtain opens. Libre's standing there, still with Whistle's skin wrapping him, and...the skin of Wm in his hand.

He goes under a table by the stage, where Wm's skin is seemingly placed, then smash-taps with a long stick, cueing the animatronics to sing.

It's a discordant, anti-melodic cacophony that wrecks the Florieans's ears, then they see Libre impaling the table, and then...dancing(?)

It's hard to determine what is and what isn't as this point, what the scent of cherry being the most prominent thing the Florieans feel from the discordant choir. All they know is that something of an eldritch nature is, uh, emerging, for lack of a better word.

They don't even know that Libre had left this universe with the Pizza at hand.

[josh6243]

The interdimensional police attempt to arrest Libre and confiscate the pizza for being contraband. Some time later, the pizza was stolen by ...

[SapphireStarblazer]

ELLIOT THE MAD MOTHERFUCKING CAT, WHO HAS COME STRAIGHT FROM THE OUTER SKIRTS OF THE UNIVERSE JUST TO GET THAT PIZZA.

"...sup."

[Cassie]

For some odd reason, a human Libre nad-kicks Elliot, then scurries off with the Pizza.

[Despair's Archon of Memes]

... Only to encounter MP, who, after a long break from Pizza-catching, electrocutes Libre with a taser.

It's good to be back...

MP runs off with the Pizza and decides to cook it into spaghetti...

No one will ever know...

[SapphireStarblazer]

But alas. Elliot was already in the cooking station, licking his paws like a madman. Upon noticing MP, he gives off a meow. This hypnotizes MP just long enough to order him to give him the pizza box, which he then sits on before it launches out the window and into the stratosphere.
Unforutunately, before he could treat himself a slice, he gets unceremoniously rammed by...

[Florien]

a RAM! Of the battering kind. Like for old-timey sieges. Where the Florie/ans got that will be a mystery forever, if you don't ask the siege history museum security guards, the widows and orphans of the siege history museum security guards, or the police and people who were there at the siege history museum about ten minutes before the Florie/ans showed up here. How it got into the sky is another mystery, again, unless you ask the same people what happened to their giant howitzer. The ram smashes into Elliot, tearing his body apart, and as usual, the Pizza flies off, unharmed. Florien pulls a cord and sets the battering ram to glide to where the Pizza fell, and Florian scans the skies with a flak cannon mounted atop the battering ram, occasionally setting off little bursts of flak in the sky, probably violating airspace treaties and possibly violating the geneva convention. They soon arrive at the Pizza, which conveniently landed in the middle of Stonehenge, when...

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn steps on them with his giant Mecha, then jumps out and grabs the pizza, but then magical energy starts coming out of Stonehenge.

[SapphireStarblazer]

It was Elliot, using the circle to bring himself back from the dead after the incident with the battering ram in space managing to kill him instantly.  The green magic fire that reformed Elliot's mind and body and placed his soul in it was also responsible for at least knocking superjohn back.  He then looked down and noticed the pizza, descending back in front of it and grabbing it by the paws, before...

[josh6243]

Commander Yammark rapid-fires her arm buster at Elliot. She steals another slice of pizza before making her grand escape. Suddenly, Zero retires her as someone had tipped him off to her location.

"Thanks for finding this Maverick for me," stated Zero as he handed the pizza to the shyster, who revealed themselves to be ...

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Matthew appears with a cannon, and fires it which blows Yanmark several hundred feet away, leaving the pizza falling in the air as he catches it and makes a run for it.