Close Circle

[Magolor]

"Hey, calm your pants down. We don't really know if this gent is really the killer." He tries to think about what evidence they really had, but his late entry doesn't really help.

[Florien]

You want evidence? You people are so picky!

It is quite simple. There are three independent pieces of evidence implicating Soseki. Firstly, his shoe-prints were found. Prints that could only be his, going to the kitchen where the dumping of all this gear was done. Secondly, gloves which fit many people, but most notably him, were found in the bin! Thirdly and most importantly, I say he is guilty, so guilty he is!

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

And time is up on investigating and voting. There will be no execution today. And no one will be getting Gin's money.

Carmello pulls out his own specialized golden lighter and sets ablaze the $700 that belonged to Gin, burning it all up to ashes.

I don't get why only some of you came in to investigate. Was hoping some of you could try to get rid of a cop this day. But you all blew it. So you all better hope you do well enough on the next job I'll have for you all shortly.

Carmello heads back to his office.

(OOC The challenge will come tomorrow to let Free Association and Last Summer get going, as well as Experimental Error on Discord)

[Florien]

ALL blew it? Everyone else blew it! I did better than everyone else put together!

El Presidente is right! You will see that you should have had Soseki shot when you had the chance!

[Kennifer]

"Hey jeez, I was trying to investigate and make sure we didn't get the wrong person again!"

[Florien]

If El Presidente says a person is the right person, that person is the right person! If only you people could see that as I do!

Penultimo sounds huffy about the matter.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Guys, I need your help! My girlfriend Baby Doll Felicity has been kidnapped by the Russian Mafia. Guess they're still mad at us over whacking Sidorov. They're demanding I give them a billion dollars. I'm not gonna cave to them! But I will ask that you all rescue her.... please. Here are the tasks:

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.
2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.
3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.
4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.
5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.

The deadline will be on Tuesday, September 14 at 6:00 PM CST.

[PointMaid]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.

Snakeweed puts out a call... to her Shire Mafia buddies. That's right, about fifty scrappy Hobbits on ponies with shiny elven penknife-sized daggers, who usually do the grunt work of buying and selling pipeweed, making sure the farmers don't ask too much and getting the supply where it needs to go. Very stealthy. There's also her small inner circle of female enforcers, the Venus Flytraps. They're well practiced at seduction, and have a special knockout perfume.

2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.

Snakeweed instructs her army of Hobbits to get jobs as bartenders and waiters throughout Little Russia. They're to listen out until they hear one of Sidorov's men (or Sidorov himself!) be careless and mention it. If they aren't being loose-lipped? Bring in one of the Venus Flytraps to get them drunk and willing to run their mouth off to impress a lady.

3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.

Now the Shire Mafia is going to come through on pony cavalry with crossbows! These folks are veterans of the Sacking of the Shire incident, believe it.

4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.

Snakeweed rides in with the Shire Mafia! They clear each room until they find her and get Felicity riding double on Snakeweed's pony.

5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.


Okay. Anything valuable? Gold, gems, firearms, ammo, drugs? Put it all in your saddlebags as we ride out, gentlehobbits!

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.

Snakeweed puts out a call... to her Shire Mafia buddies. That's right, about fifty scrappy Hobbits on ponies with shiny elven penknife-sized daggers, who usually do the grunt work of buying and selling pipeweed, making sure the farmers don't ask too much and getting the supply where it needs to go. Very stealthy. There's also her small inner circle of female enforcers, the Venus Flytraps. They're well practiced at seduction, and have a special knockout perfume.

2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.

Snakeweed instructs her army of Hobbits to get jobs as bartenders and waiters throughout Little Russia. They're to listen out until they hear one of Sidorov's men (or Sidorov himself!) be careless and mention it. If they aren't being loose-lipped? Bring in one of the Venus Flytraps to get them drunk and willing to run their mouth off to impress a lady.

3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.

Now the Shire Mafia is going to come through on pony cavalry with crossbows! These folks are veterans of the Sacking of the Shire incident, believe it.

4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.

Snakeweed rides in with the Shire Mafia! They clear each room until they find her and get Felicity riding double on Snakeweed's pony.

5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.


Okay. Anything valuable? Gold, gems, firearms, ammo, drugs? Put it all in your saddlebags as we ride out, gentlehobbits!

Snakeweed has rolled a 1, 5, 8, 2 and 6 for a total of 22 points.

1.      Is there a mole inside the Mafia? Did the Russian Mafia get some inside information before hand? Whatever the case, the second your Shire Mafia and Venus Flytraps came around, they were ready for them. The Russian Mafia quickly massacred them all, guns blazing. They were all quickly outmanned and outgunned by the Russkies. In the end, there were are these bloody bodies left. Not a single one of them survived. It is quite the barbaric sight.

2.      Your army dead, you have to take the reigns yourself and disguise yourself as a waiter in Little Russia. After a while, you do learn the whereabouts of Felicia and set off.

3.      With no army, it's just you against the Russians. Though thankfully you handle yourself well, with your combat abilities and being able to conceal yourself well due to your small stature. You manage to fight off all the Russians, with no harm to yourself. Guess you didn't need an army to survive them.

4.      Unfortunately, Felicity is nowhere to be found. You really haven't found anything suggesting she's dead, but you don't know if she's alive either. All you can hope is she made it out OK, but you'll have to go back to the mansion without her. And Carmello probably won't be too happy about it.

5.      Raiding one of their bases goes decently for you. You manage to steal a lot of their weapons and ammo. Sure, with the couple missions already done, the Mafia has plenty, but hey, better too much than not enough, right?

[PointMaid]

...When Snakeweed gets back, she dumps the loot at Carmello's feet, but she's practically inconsolable over the loss of her Shire Mafia comrades.

...Robwise, Wilthur, Margarita, Snapdragon... I can't believe it...

[Magolor]

He grimaces at Gin's earned cash burn away.

"Man, do we really gotta kill those guys? Maybe we could just scare 'em home in their underwear."

This IS a question which answer I'll react to.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Thank you, Snakeweed. Just wish you brought back Felicity though..

Carmello turns his attention to Joe.

Because! If you don't kill them, they'll kill you... if you're not one of them that is. And unless you feel like being a new victim, I suggested you get out there and earn that money to vote those bastards off

Carmello sounded very angry as he looked into Pizzabug's room, peaking before closing the door quickly, looking like he's about to be on the verge of tears.

[Weirdguy149]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.
Okay, you're going to need a bunch of guys to carry out this job. Recruit some of Carmello's guys and perhaps some Kremlings left behind by K. Rool.
2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.
Split up and find out where Felicity is being kept from anyone on the street. Once you get the proper intel, reconvene at that place.
3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.
You'll snipe at some of the goons. While they're confused, your men will take control of the situation by killing the rest. You don't give a shit about innocents besides the girl.
4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.
Hopefully the place is taken over by the time you pick Felicity up. You'll escort her personally either way.
5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.
Send your guys along with any potential recruits from the other base to the nearest base. You trust them more than the other criminals back home.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.
Okay, you're going to need a bunch of guys to carry out this job. Recruit some of Carmello's guys and perhaps some Kremlings left behind by K. Rool.
2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.
Split up and find out where Felicity is being kept from anyone on the street. Once you get the proper intel, reconvene at that place.
3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.
You'll snipe at some of the goons. While they're confused, your men will take control of the situation by killing the rest. You don't give a shit about innocents besides the girl.
4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.
Hopefully the place is taken over by the time you pick Felicity up. You'll escort her personally either way.
5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.
Send your guys along with any potential recruits from the other base to the nearest base. You trust them more than the other criminals back home.

Mike has rolled a 3, 8, 8, 4 and 4 for a total of 27 points.

1.      You can only find one guy. He looks like he's totally unmotivated for this line of work. But you bring him along anyway and hope for the best. Maybe he'll make himself useful for you after all. We'll see.

2.      You and your guy go along the streets, interrogating everyone into finding out where Felicity is. Both of you get the necessary info real quick and meet over to the location.

3.      You're quite the shot perched above, blowing away their heads with your Sniper Rifle. And your guy is also quite handy with his gun too. You both make short work of them all as you all head into the base and rescue Felicity.

4.      As you make your escape, the back-up has arrived and attempt to ram you all off the road to kill you. You manage to fight back and after an enduring chase, you evade them and bring Felicity back safe and sound.

5.      You send your one guy to attack one of their bases. He fights valiantly, taking out quite a bit of the Russians. In the end, he loses and gets killed. But damn, he sure did fight. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all.

[Kennifer]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.

Text a bunch of people, both some of Carmello's goons and some of her own contacts. Anyone she thinks will be useful at fighting or getting information. She'll send them information on the plan, as well as a photo of Felicity (this will come in handy later.) She'll send everyone to a meeting point, then grab some weapons (guns, switchblades, whatever's easiest to grab) from the storage, borrow a car again, and meet her cronies at the rendezvous point.

2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.

This is where the photos come in handy. Have everyone go around to various places of business (particularly the shadier ones) and ask where the lady is being held. Be as "persuasive" as needed. Keep in contact with one another using phones, then meet up for the rescue.

3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.

And this is where the weapons come in handy for killing those Russian goons. Hopefully she's brought enough for everyone if they didn't bring something of their own.

4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.

Escort her to the "borrowed" car. Ensure her that she'll be fine, there's just one more stop to make and she'll be back home. The rest of Kim's cronies can form a convoy around the safe car.

5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.

Find the base and steal whatever's not nailed down, have everybody load stuff into their cars, and have the convoy escort Kim and Felicity home.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.

Text a bunch of people, both some of Carmello's goons and some of her own contacts. Anyone she thinks will be useful at fighting or getting information. She'll send them information on the plan, as well as a photo of Felicity (this will come in handy later.) She'll send everyone to a meeting point, then grab some weapons (guns, switchblades, whatever's easiest to grab) from the storage, borrow a car again, and meet her cronies at the rendezvous point.

2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.

This is where the photos come in handy. Have everyone go around to various places of business (particularly the shadier ones) and ask where the lady is being held. Be as "persuasive" as needed. Keep in contact with one another using phones, then meet up for the rescue.

3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.

And this is where the weapons come in handy for killing those Russian goons. Hopefully she's brought enough for everyone if they didn't bring something of their own.

4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.

Escort her to the "borrowed" car. Ensure her that she'll be fine, there's just one more stop to make and she'll be back home. The rest of Kim's cronies can form a convoy around the safe car.

5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.

Find the base and steal whatever's not nailed down, have everybody load stuff into their cars, and have the convoy escort Kim and Felicity home.

Kim has rolled a 3, 7, 2, 2 and 1 for a total of 15 points.

1.      You texted all the people, but you only got a couple of responses from a couple of your friends, a couple of tattooed tough chicks such as yourself. Not as much as you were hoping for, but better than nothing. You all get switchblades. You all better be good with knives, since they'll all probably have guns.

2.      You send your girls around the city and you get the answer eventually, reminding people “Hey, I drunk drain cleaner, bitch, so don't fuck with me!” You get Felicia's whereabouts and text your girls and head your way over there.

3.      You know the saying “Don't bring a knife to a gunfight”? Truer words have never been spoken here as the Russians just fire all their weaponry at you. None of you can even get close enough to them to do any damage and if you all try anything, you'd all get killed. You all decide that the risk of losing your life isn't worth it if all you have is blades.

4.      But still, you persist on finding Felicia. But being alerted to your presence, they quickly take her away and move to a newer, unknown location. There was nothing you could do to stop them.

5.      That drain cleaner you drunk must have really rotted your brain. You go looking for a base, but instead you make your way inside the football stadium…. During a Chokers game. Down by 5, with 4 seconds left on the clock, you manage to stumble your way across the field and walk right in the player who was about to score the game-winning touchdown. Your interference cost them all the game. Now the entire town, plus the Chokers, totally hate you for ruining what was deemed to be a very important game that had serious playoff implications. You sure you don't want to kill yourself off for good by drinking the drain cleaner again?

[Florien]

Tropico versus Russia? Ha! It's like that time I sold Russia weapons and stole the winter palace so that I could take the weapons back when they invaded!

Step one: Call upon the TROPICAN ARMY to show up here! It has tanks, it has planes, it has drones, it has guys in jeeps!

Step two: Well, obviously, finding out where Felicity is is easy! Just send out a drone to look for her!

Step three: Swoop in with the might of TROPICO to destroy the Russian Mafia compound! Bombs from the sky, Drones blasting people in the streets, Tanks firing through the walls, and infantry being THERE!

Step four: Well, there won't be enough mafia left to stop her from just walking back on her own. But provide an armed escort anyway, the infantry has to do SOMETHING to be useful.

Step five: Send Tropican Hackers to drain all the accounts of the Russian Mafia, and cause the buildings to burn down by overheating their computers. That'll show them.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Tropico versus Russia? Ha! It's like that time I sold Russia weapons and stole the winter palace so that I could take the weapons back when they invaded!

Step one: Call upon the TROPICAN ARMY to show up here! It has tanks, it has planes, it has drones, it has guys in jeeps!

Step two: Well, obviously, finding out where Felicity is is easy! Just send out a drone to look for her!

Step three: Swoop in with the might of TROPICO to destroy the Russian Mafia compound! Bombs from the sky, Drones blasting people in the streets, Tanks firing through the walls, and infantry being THERE!

Step four: Well, there won't be enough mafia left to stop her from just walking back on her own. But provide an armed escort anyway, the infantry has to do SOMETHING to be useful.

Step five: Send Tropican Hackers to drain all the accounts of the Russian Mafia, and cause the buildings to burn down by overheating their computers. That'll show them.

El Presidente has rolled a 2, 8, 10, 3 and 7 for a total of 30 points.

1.      You tried to get ahold of the Tropican Army, but they have not responded to you, the Presidente! Why is that? Maybe they're all too busy fighting some war or something for the great nation of Tropico. Either way, you and Penultimo are on your own for the time being.

2.      The drone you sent to find Felicity is very successful as you manage to find her within a matter of seconds. Onwards to her you go!

3.      You finally managed to get the Tropican Army here. They come on in and massacre the Russian Mafia members present with all your military might. Bombing everything, the infantry shooting everyone and the drones blasting them all away. But they all get carried away and start killing off innocents in the streets. It's become problematic to the point where the US Government declared this as an Act of War and send their own army after yours. Congratulations, you have started World War III.

4.      Felicity is too scared of the chaos, between the Russians getting slaughtered and the Tropican and US armies battling, she bolts off out of sight. All you can do is hope she makes it out OK and make it to Carmello's all safe.

5.      The hackers do their job quite well. All the accounts of the Russian Mafia have been drained and sent to your own personal bank accounts in Tropico. And their computers get so hot, it sets their compound ablaze. You have made a nice little dent in the Russian Mafia, all in the great name of Tropico.

[Florien]

HA! Tropico at war with the US? That's a Caribbean Badge of Honor! We'll build nukes and go to war with the EU next! NO SUPERPOWER IS SAFE FROM US!

Presidente! That was amazing! Also, we've reeinvested the funds stolen from the Russian Mafia into building more hydroponic plantations for growing bananas for juice making! Tropico will be the juiciest country around!

[-20 Relations with the US, Free Hydroponic Plantation, Free Juice Factory.]

[Kennifer]

After getting back from the mission Kim is just... gonna look for something to drink.

She seems to not even give a shit if she gets drain cleaner again; she just looks done as hell with everything from today.

[PointMaid]

Snakeweed is going to join Kim in looking for a drink. Her eyes are pretty red.

...Snapdragon...

[PointMaid]

^ (Oops, that should've been the green markup!)

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Reminder for those who haven't done the challenge (@MadameButterflyKnife @TalesofUnder @CustardAndPie @Magolor @TheGeekArtist08 @Tophat_E) that the deadline is tomorrow, plus if another decides to take the replacement spot for Pizzabug

[MadeOfMilk]

Guys, I need your help! My girlfriend Baby Doll Felicity has been kidnapped by the Russian Mafia. Guess they're still mad at us over whacking Sidorov. They're demanding I give them a billion dollars. I'm not gonna cave to them! But I will ask that you all rescue her.... please. Here are the tasks:

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.
2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.
3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.
4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.
5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.

The deadline will be on Tuesday, September 14 at 6:00 PM CST.

1. Snult? Snult. Escargoon rallies up all the cult members, arms 'em with weapons, bada bing bada boom.

Hmph. They come in handy after all.

2. Escargoon and his, well, goons all pile into a van, one of the cult members acting as a chauffeur. They all search known locations and gather intel from locals (via intimidation). Once a location is found? Drive there. In the middle of the night, of course.

3. The cult members can do all the fighting, alongside some sentries Escargoon whipped up and brought along. Escargoon controls the sentries from a distance. Russian Mafia members who survive get temporarily knocked out with a soundwave machine, also built by Escargoon.

4. Hope she enjoys van rides, 'cause she's riding in the back of the van with Escargoon and a bunch of weird guys who worship a snail.

5. Escargoon and his snult get more information out of locals (with more intimidation!), as well as any info from any surviving members of whatever the fuck just happened in step 3. Using that, they all track down the main base. Step 3 is repeated here. Boom, baby! Also some of the cult members steal stuff they found in the base.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Guys, I need your help! My girlfriend Baby Doll Felicity has been kidnapped by the Russian Mafia. Guess they're still mad at us over whacking Sidorov. They're demanding I give them a billion dollars. I'm not gonna cave to them! But I will ask that you all rescue her.... please. Here are the tasks:

1. Arm yourself well and/or find an army to help.
2. Find out where Felicity is being kept.
3. Fight your way through and kill as many as those Russian Mafia members as you can that are holding her hostage.
4. Rescue Felicity and bring her back to my mansion safe and sound.
5. Get the Russian Mafia back by raiding one of their own main bases.

The deadline will be on Tuesday, September 14 at 6:00 PM CST.

1. Snult? Snult. Escargoon rallies up all the cult members, arms 'em with weapons, bada bing bada boom.

Hmph. They come in handy after all.

2. Escargoon and his, well, goons all pile into a van, one of the cult members acting as a chauffeur. They all search known locations and gather intel from locals (via intimidation). Once a location is found? Drive there. In the middle of the night, of course.

3. The cult members can do all the fighting, alongside some sentries Escargoon whipped up and brought along. Escargoon controls the sentries from a distance. Russian Mafia members who survive get temporarily knocked out with a soundwave machine, also built by Escargoon.

4. Hope she enjoys van rides, 'cause she's riding in the back of the van with Escargoon and a bunch of weird guys who worship a snail.

5. Escargoon and his snult get more information out of locals (with more intimidation!), as well as any info from any surviving members of whatever the fuck just happened in step 3. Using that, they all track down the main base. Step 3 is repeated here. Boom, baby! Also some of the cult members steal stuff they found in the base.

Escargoon has rolled a 9, 7, 3, 1 and 1 for a total of 21 points.

1.      You manage to gather all your Snult members, which have grown in number ever since the Snurch started and are looking to expand their reaches outside of Crunch City, so you can have even more at your disposal. And you arm them all with machine guns, shotguns, grenades, bazookas. The Snult is completely well-armed and numerous. You got yourself a nice army to rival that of Tropico.

2.      Your intimidation works as you gather your army into the van and quickly head over there into the night, armed to the teeth and numbers on your side. But how will that aid you? We shall see.

3.      The bad news is the Russians are prepared for the Snult. You all do what you can to fight, but they destroy the sentries and a good number of your Snult get wiped out. They too have numbers on their side and they're winning the battle.

4.      As you drive off in the van, with Felicity and the surviving Snult members in tow, a Russian care quickly catches up with you and quickly runs you off a cliff, sending the van tumbling down some rocks and crashing hard below. Being a gelatinous form, you make it out with quite a few injures, but you're alive otherwise. But the rest of them? The Snult members, even Felicity herself, were all killed in the crash. You try to get them all to rise up, but corpses aren't very responsive.

5.      Without the numbers on your side, the intimidation doesn't work, but you do find the base. And what happens? It's a trap! As you approach, several large salt shakers appear and toss salt all over you, making your skin bubble and burn as it chews away your body due to dehydration. You lie in agony as you start to melt away into a purply goo. The paramedics arrive and take you to ICU. You do recover, but all at the cost of the mission.