Hunger Games Simulator - Trouble Cube Edition

[Dookie]

I nominate Zim and GIR (both safe, male)

[Billy5545]

Anyway, I can volunteer to run this season

[~okami~]

Ford Prefect

Hayao Miyazaki

Both male both safe

[GoldenCityBird]

VIRTUAL SINGERS

2-D of Gorillaz (M, safe)

Cherry of Studio Killers (F, safe)

[awe921]

Firefox and Ruffle, both safe

[Dookie]

I'll volunteer to host.

[wahoothis]

Kiyoka Maki

Kinji Uehara

(Both yellow)

[PowerStroke6001]

Carrying over my tradition from TVT, I'll start off with this Experiment-Pokemon duo, Team 626: Stitch and Bouffalant. I'll rule the latter as safe since Pokemon are shown to be sapient even if they communicate differently, but if the rules here say otherwise...

[Magolor]

Team How The Heck Did We Get A Gladiator Arena After All (alternatively, just "Team Jazz"):

The Pianist and the Cellist

Both very safe.

(Thought I should mention: Pianist is female, Cellist is male)

[door-kun]

Akira Kurusu (YELLOW)

Peko Pekoyama (SAFE)

[AlbertThompsonJr]

Korben Dallas and Leeloo from The Fifth Element (should be safe, as while her physical body is newly created, but her spirit's been existing for at least 5,000 years, and she's physically in her mid-20s, so)

[DaveTheAssassin]

James Bond (as played by Daniel Craig) and Madeleine Swann, because I'm in a 007 mood today

[PowerStroke6001]

A bit late, but nominations have been closed! Time to suggest events!

[Zanreo]

30 events let's goooo

• (Player1) (goes/goes/goes/goes/go1) on a quiz show. [TypeA1] (slams/slams/slam/slams/slam1) the buttons so many times the panel on [typeC1] podium, the host's podium, and the quiz sign explodes.
  
• (Player1) (manages/manages/manages/manages/manage1) to fly by flapping [typeC1] arms.
  
• (Player1) (falls/falls/falls/falls/fall1) off a cliff, but (manages/manages/manages/manages/manage1) to get back up by flapping [typeC1] arms really really hard.
  
• (Player1) (tells/tells/tells/tells/tell1) (Player2) that (Player3) (is a bad person/is a bad person/is a bad person/is a bad person/is bad persons1). (Player2) replies that to [typeB2], hero's is just bad person. (Player1) replies "(Friend/Friend/Friend/Friend/Friends2) you are crazy!"
  
• As (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/tries1) defeating (Player2), (Player3) (gives/gives/gives/gives/give3) (Player2) a power boost, making [typeB2] stronger than (Player1). (Player1) runs away.
  
• (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/try1) convincing the others that (Player2) doesn't actually exist.
  
• (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/try1) setting fire to (Player2)'s camp, but (Player2) (was/was/was/was/were1) prepared and already fireproofed it.
  
• Upon seeing (Player1) kiss (Player2), (Player3) (shakes/shakes/shakes/shakes/shake3) [typeC3] fists and (yells/yells/yell/yells/yell3) "NOOOOOOOOO!" (blacklisted)
  
• (Player1) (cheats/cheats/cheats/cheats/cheat1) to be able to use more weapons than [typeA1] can carry.
  
• (Player1) (tells/tells/tells/tells/tell1) (Player2) [typeA2] is [typeC1] favorite (character/character/character/character/characters2) from [typeC2] source material.
  
• (Player1) (tells/tells/tells/tells/tell1) (Player2) [typeA2] is [typeC1] least favorite (character/character/character/character/characters2) from [typeC2] source material.
  
• (Player1) (surfs/surfs/surfs/surfs/surf1) around the Arena on a turtle shell.
  
• (Player1) (does/does/does/does/do1) a backwards long jump to get to the top of an endless set of stairs.
  
• (Player1) (wins/wins/wins/wins/win1) a chicken. [TypeA1] (decides/decides/decides/decides/decide1) to hire it as a manager.
  
• (Player1) (grabs/grabs/grabs/grabs/grab1) a bunch of nails and (shoves/shoves/shoves/shoves/shove1) them into (Player2)'s (mouth/mouth/mouth/mouth/mouths2) before punching [typeC2] (face/face/face/face/faces2). (fatal?)
  
• (Player1) (shoves/shoves/shoves/shoves/shove1) (a lit firecracker/a lit firecracker/a lit firecracker/a lit firecracker/lit firecrackers2) into (Player2)'s (mouth/mouth/mouth/mouth/mouths2).(fatal)
  
• (Player1) (grabs a kettle/grabs a kettle/grabs a kettle/grabs a kettle/grab kettles1) of boiling hot water and pours it on (Player2) while stepping on [typeB2].
  
• (Player1) (puts/puts/puts/puts/put1) (an orange/an orange/an orange/an orange/oranges2) into (Player2)'s (mouth/mouth/mouth/mouth/mouths2) before stomping on [typeC2] (face/face/face/face/faces2) while [typeA2] is down, making (a fountain/a fountain/a fountain/a fountain/fountains2) of juice spout from [typeC2] (mouth/mouth/mouth/mouth/mouths2).
  
• (Player1) puts (a bottle crate/a bottle crate/a bottle crate/a bottle crate/bottle crates1) over (Player2)'s (head/head/head/head/heads2) and (kicks/kicks/kicks/kicks/kick1) it around a few times before splitting it in two with a karate chop.
  
• (Player1) (picks/picks/picks/picks/pick1) up (a motorcycle/motorcycle/motorcycle/motorcycle/motorcycles1), (knocks/knocks/knocks/knocks/knock1) over (Player2) and (breaks/breaks/breaks/breaks/break1) it in half over [typeB2].
  
• (Player1) (stabs/stabs/stabs/stabs/stab1) (Player2) with (an umbrella/an umbrella/an umbrella/an umbrella/umbrellas2) before jamming (a knife/a knife/a knife/a knife/knives2) into [typeC2] (shoulder/shoulder/shoulder/shoulder/shoulders2). (fatal)
  
• (Player1) (makes/makes/makes/makes/make1) a bootleg version of (Player2)'s source material.
  
• (Player1) (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) an achievement for killing (Player2).
  
• While watching a stream of (Player1) getting beaten up, (Player2) (laughs/laughs/laughs/laughs/laugh2) and (says/says/says/says/say2) "This is DELICIOUS!"
  
• Upon seeing (Player1) get knocked out, (Player2) lets out a triumphant "YES! YES!"
  
• (Player1) finally (goes/goes/goes/goes/go1) to jail for [typeC1] crimes. (non-fatal)
  
• (Player1) (pushes/pushes/pushes/pushes/pushes1) start to rich.
  
• After (Player1) (cuts/cuts/cuts/cuts/cut1) off (one of/one of/one of/one of/one each of2) (Player2)'s arms in a fight, (Player2) (says/says/says/says/say2) "'Tis but a scratch" and that [typeA2]'s had worse.
  
• After (Player1) (cuts/cut/cut/cut/cuts1) off (Player2)'s arms in a fight, (Player2) (claims/claim/claim/claim/claims2) that it's just a flesh wound.
  
• (Player1) (presses/presses/presses/presses/press1) (a button/a button/a button/a button/buttons1) on [typeB1] (phone/phone/phone/phone/phones1) to shoot (a giant orbital laser/a giant orbital laser/a giant orbital laser/a giant orbital laser/giant orbital lasers1) at (Player2), (Player3), (Player4) and (Player5).
  

[Oggy123]

Animal Event

Strange beams of light descend and transform the tributes into animals.

• (Player1) (isn't/isn't/isn't/isn't/aren't1) hit by the beams and (stays/stays/stays/stays/stay1) normal. (Survive)
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1)turned into (a mouse/a mouse/a mouse/a mouse/mice1), and gets trampled by the Peacekeepers.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a cockroach/a cockroach/a cockroach/a cockroach/cockroaches1), and (is/is/are/is/are) swatted by (Player2).
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a frog/a frog/a frog/a frog/a frogs1) and (Player2) (is/is/is/is/are2) turned into (a fly/a fly/a fly/a fly/flies1). The former promptly eats the latter.
  
• (Player1), (Player2), and (Player3) turn into wolves. They devour (Player4).
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a chicken/a chicken/a chicken/a chicken/a chickens1) (Player2) and (Player3) fry [typeA1] for lunch.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a fish/a fish/a fish/a fish/fish1) and (dies/dies/dies/dies/die1) from a lack of water.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a gecko/a gecko/a gecko/a gecko/geckos1) and (Player2) (is/is/is/is/are2) turned into (an insect/an insect/an insect/an insect/insects1). The former then eats the latter.
  
• (Player1), (Player2), and (Player3) turn into insects. A horribly starving (Player4) (eats/eats/eats/eats/eat3) them out of desperation.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a turkey/a turkey/a turkey/a turkey/turkeys1). (Player2) shoots and eats [typeA1].
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a rat/a rat/a rat/a rat/rats1), and (is/is/are/is/are1) then eaten by an eagle.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a fox/a fox/a fox/a fox/foxes1)and (Player2) (is/is/are/is/are2) turned into (a chicken/a chicken/a chicken/a chicken/chickens1). The former promptly eats the latter.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a cat/a cat/a cat/a cat/cats1) and (Player2) (is/is/are/is/are2) turned into (a mouse/a mouse/a mouse/a mouse/mice1). The former then eats the latter.
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (an alligator/an alligator/an alligator/an alligator/alligators1), and then (eats/eats/eat/eats/eat1) (Player2), (Player3). and (Player4).
  
• (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) turned into (a penguin/a penguin/a penguin/a penguin/a penguins1), and (is/is/are/is/are1) eaten by (Player2), who is turned into (a leopard seal/a leopard seal/a leopard seal/a leopard seal/leopard seals2)

Other Events

• (Player1), (Player2), (Player3), and (Player4) drop their chocolate spread on a rock. They decide to eat it it off the rock, but an eagle poops on it. (Grizzy and the Lemmings reference)
  

[MisterJake]

New event ideas-

Fatal Events

* "The simulator has spoken," President Snow says to (Player1) as (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) dying from the elements of nature.
* (Player1) (claims/claims/claims/claims/claim1) that there's no such thing as a leopard right before [typeA1] (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) killed by a pack of them.
* "Nice view up here, (Player1)," (Player2) (says/says/says/says/say2) to [typeB1] in the afterlife after they died in a car accident.
* (Player1) (drowns/drowns/drowns/drowns/drown1) in a pool full of chili.
* "28 STAB WOUNDS!" (Player1) (yells/yells/yells/yells/yell1) out loud while interrogating (Player2) on [typeB2] killing (Player3).
* (Player1)'s rap song is so "lit" that [typeA1] literally (sets/sets/sets/sets/set1) (Player2) on fire.
* (Player1) (kills/kills/kills/kills/kill1) (Player2), and then (props/props/props/props/prop1) [typeC2] dead (body/body/body/body/bodies2) up to make it look like [typeA2] (is/is/are/is/are2) just chilling.
* (Player1) (kills/kills/kills/kills/kill1) (Player2), but (believes/believes/believes/believes/believe1) that (Player2) (is/is/is/is/are2) just sleeping instead of being outright dead.
* "And (I/I/I/I/we2) killed (Player1), too! HAHAHAHAHA!" (Player2) (says/says/says/says/say2) as [typeA2] (closes/closes/close/closes/close1) a song about how [typeA2] secretly engineered most of the events this season.
* (Player1) (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) killed by some flying monkeys.
* (Player1) (gives/gives/gives/gives/give1) up [typeC1] own (life/life/life/life/lives1) so that the other tributes could have some more food. (Feast)
* The simulator doesn't want to see (Player1) on this season so it wastes zero time killing [typeB1] off immediately. (Bloodbath)

Non-Fatal Events

* "No copyright law in the universe is going to stop (me/me/me/me/us1)!" (Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) before uploading a video online that gets removed ASAP due to copyright issues.
* After (Player1) (runs/runs/runs/runs/run1) a song's lyrics through several layers of Google Translate, [typeA1] (goes/goes/go/goes/go1) on to sing the song with the new translated lyrics.
* (Player1) (sings/sings/sings/sings/sing1) "Let It Snow" alongside President Snow.
* (Player1) (informs/informs/informs/informs/inform1) (Player2) that the latter (has/has/has/has/have2) an outdated autopsy report of the first fallen non-group tribute this season.
* (Player1) (dislikes/dislikes/dislikes/dislikes/dislike1) everyone else more than [typeA1] (dislikes/dislikes/dislike/dislikes/dislike1) (Player2) and (Player3). (Player1) (thinks/thinks/thinks/thinks/think1) (Player2) and (Player3) mistake that for friendship.
*  (Player1) (saves/saves/saves/saves/save1) the life of a monster.
*  (Player1) (finds/finds/finds/finds/find1) Dove in a soapless place.
*  (Player1) (gains/gains/gains/gains/gain1) the power to breathe underwater, and (uses/uses/uses/uses/use1) that power to explore an underwater kingdom.
*  "Let's get down to business to defeat (Player1)," (Player2) (says/says/says/says/say2) to (Player3), (Player4), (Player5), and (Player6).
* (Player1) and (Player2) decide to make a Christmas tree together.
* (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) trending on Twitter right now.
* (Player1) (talks/talks/talk/talks/talk) about how [typeA1] once participated in something called the Great Caterpillar War to (Player2).
*  (Player1) would have successfully killed (Player2) if alternate universe versions of (Player2) didn't come in to save [typeB2].
* "Why do donuts have to die?" (Player1) (asks/asks/asks/asks/ask1) to (Player2) who (gets/gets/gets/gets/get2) very confused by that question.
* "There once was a ship that sank," (Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) to (Player2) as the former (tells/tells/tells/tells/tell) the latter a story about the Titantic.
* (Player1) (transforms/transforms/transforms/transforms/transform1) into (a merman/a mermaid/a merperson/a merobject/merpeople1).
* (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/try1) to sel(l a/l a/l a/l a/l2) coffi(n/n/n/n/ns2) to (Player2) just in case [typeA2] (dies/dies/die/dies/die2) within this deadly game.
* (Player1) and (Player2) try to wake up (Player3), but [typeA3] just (wouldn't/wouldn't/won't/wouldn't/won't3) wake up.

[Cassie]

• (Player1) (eats/eats/eats/eats/eat1) an egg-shaped fungus. (also Feast)
  
• (Player1) (eats/eats/eats/eats/eat1) an egg-shaped fungus and (dies/dies/dies/dies/die1). (also Feast)
  
• (Player1) (blows/blows/blows/blows/blow1) a balloon using an assault rifle.
  
• (Player1) (squirts/squirts/squirts/squirts/squirt1) goo from an assault rifle, disgusting (Player2).
  
• (Player1) and (Player2) play russian roulette, but with a toy gun and a balloon.
  
• Reality breifly lags, spontaneously dismembering (Player1), (Player2), and (Player3).
  
• (Player1) (wonders/wonders/wonders/wonders/wonder1) what's for lunch. (Day-only)
  

[Guma]

Nonfatal (4):
Guess who's back. Back again. (Player1)(’s/’s/’s/’s/’re) back. Tell your friends.
(Player1) (takes/takes/takes/takes/take1) (Player2) aboard [typeC1] base and tortures [typeB2] for 6 months.
(Player1) (gawk/gawk/gawk/gawk/gawks1) at Player2's incorrectly formatted event.
You know (Player1) had to do it to ‘em.

Fatal (2):
(Player2) (poisons/poisons/poisons/poisons/poison2) (Player1)’s wine while (typeA1) (is/is/are/is/are1)n't looking, then (swaps/swaps/swap/swaps/swap2) the glasses. They drink and (Player2) (dies/dies/dies/dies/die1). Turns out they were both poisoned; (Player1) spent the last few years building up an immunity to iocane powder.
(Player1) (falls/falls/falls/falls/fall1) down a hole and (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) sent to Brazil. (Yes, this is a fatal event.)

[The Map Maker]

Some events:

*(Player1) (invents/invents/invents/invents/invent1) a new fighting style called "(Player1)-Fu".

*(Player1) (kills/kills/kills/kills/kill1) (Player2) by reenacting the most infamous death of (Player3)'s source material.

*(Player1) (learns/learns/learns/learns/learn1) that [typeA1] (is/is/are/is/are1) (a being/a being/a being/a being/beings1) created from (Player2)'s suppressed emotions.

And have some Real Time Fandub Games references as well:

*(Player1) can only watch as (Player2) (flushes/flushes/flushes/flushes/flush2) (Player3), (Player4), and (Player5) down the terlet.

*(Player1) (asks/asks/asks/asks/ask1) (Player2) what is the total mass of the sun. (Player2) (answers/answers/answers/answers/answer2) with "As (Player3) told (me/me/me/me/us2), it's three!".

*(Player1) (finds/finds/finds/finds/find1) out that [typeC1] gaming (account/account/account/account/accounts1) (is/is/is/is/are1) being hacked, and (lets/lets/lets/lets/let1) out (a hellish screech/a hellish screech/a hellish screech/a hellish screech/hellish screeches1) as a result.

*(Player1)'s breath is so bad, it somehow turns (Player2), (Player3), and (Player4) into tables.

*(Player1) (tells/tells/tells/tells/tell1) (Player2) that [typeA1] (wants/wants/want/wants/want1) to ask [typeB2] a personal question, "Have you ever seen (Player3)'s source material?".

*As (Player1), (Player2), and (Player3) hold (Player4) at gunpoint, (Player2) accidentally (shoots/shoots/shoots/shoots/shoot2) [typeB4] down. (Player1) (yells/yells/yells/yells/yell1) at (Player2) for loading real bullets instead of "funny bullets".

*(Player1) (confesses/confesses/confesses/confesses/confess1) to (Player2) that [typeA1] can't actually read, and just likes looking at the pictures.

[Whistle]

(Player1) (turns/turns/turns/turns/turn1) into a giant flesh monster, so (Player2) (explodes/explodes/explodes/explodes/explode2) to stop [typeB1], killing them both. (Fatal)
(Player1) (prepares/prepares/prepares/prepares/prepare1) a Servo.
As [typeA1] (rides/rides/ride/rides/ride1) toward the castle, (Player1) (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) jousted and knocked off [typeC1] horse.
(Player1) (turns/turns/turns/turns/turn1) into a giant flesh monster, so (Player2) (explodes/explodes/explodes/explodes/explode2) to stop [typeB1]. But (Player1) (continues/continues/continues/continues/continue) to grow. (Fatal for Player2)
(Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) "Bloody Tom" four times in the mirror. Tom looks at (Player1) and ignores [typeB1].
(Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) "Bloody Tom" four times in the mirror. Tom escapes from the mirror, running right by [typeB1].
(Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) "Bloody Tom" four times in the mirror. Tom smashes his gumball head against [typeB1], severely wounding them.
(Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) "Bloody Tom" four times in the mirror. Tom wraps his arms around [typeC1] neck before [typeA1] (dies/dies/die/dies/die1). (Fatal)
(Player1) can tell that (Player2) is standing right behind [typeA1]. [typeA1] (feels/feels/feel/feels/feel1) a great overreaction. (Player1) (tears/tears/tears/tears/tear1) (Player2)'s eyes from [typeC2] head and (throws/throws/throws/throws/throw1) them into the forest.
(Player1) can tell that (Player2) is standing right behind [typeA1]. [typeA1] (feels/feels/feel/feels/feel1) a great overreaction. (Player1) (tears/tears/tears/tears/tear1) [typeC1] eyes from [typeC1] head and (throws/throws/throws/throws/throw1) them into the forest.

BLACKLISTED:
(Player1) (involves/involves/involves/involves/involve1) (himself/herself/themself/itself/themselves1) in the relationship between (Player2) and (Player3). When [typeA1] (is/is/are/is/are1) found out, (Player2) (kills/kills/kills/kills/kill2) [typeB1] for [typeC1] meddling. (Fatal)
(Player1) (involves/involves/involves/involves/involve1) (himself/herself/themself/itself/themselves1) in the relationship between (Player2) and (Player3). When [typeA1] (is/is/are/is/are1) found out, [typeA1] (kills/kills/kill/kills/kill1) (Player2) for standing up to [typeB1].

[awe921]

(Player1) (throws/throws/throws/throws/throw1) (Player3) at (Player2), then (Player2) proceeds to flip (Player3) like a coin. (Player3) lands heads up, which means (Player2) gets to go home. (Fatal, Player 2 dies)
(Player1) (gives/gives/gives/gives/give1) (Player2) a coupon for new parents, but it is expired.

[Despair's Archon of Memes]

* (Player1) (lights/lights/lights/lights/light1) (Player2) on fire using a lighter and hair spray. (Fatal to (Player2))
* (Player1) (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) crushed by a bathtub. (Fatal)

[wingedcatgirl]

Added a poll regarding non-fatal elimination events.

This isn't directly binding, but we're interested in the community's opinion on the subject and will take it into account in our ultimate decision.

[PowerStroke6001]

TVT OG Events (14)

* (Player1) (throws/throws/throws/throws/throw1) [typeC1] (shield/shield/shield/shield/shields1) like (a Frisbee/a Frisbee/a Frisbee/a Frisbee/Frisbees1) and (knocks/knocks/knocks/knocks/knock1) (Player2) dead.
* (Payer1) (yanks/yanks/yanks/yanks/yank1) (Player2)'s hair.
* (Player1) and (Player2) have a picnic together.
* (Player1) (chops/chops/chops/chops/chop1) down a tree and (crushes/crushes/crushes/crushes/crush1) (Player2) and (Player3) underneath it.
* (Player1) (steals/steals/steals/steals/steal1) some eagle eggs, but (gets/gets/gets/gets/get1) snatched away by the mother, never to be seen again.
* (Player1) (gives/gives/gives/gives/give1) (Player2) (a wedgie/a wedgie/a wedgie/a wedgie/wedgies2).
* (Player1) fatally (gouges/gouges/gouges/gouges/gouge1) out (Player2)'s eyes with (a dagger/a dagger/a dagger/a dagger/daggers1).
* (Player1) (sticks/sticks/sticks/sticks/stick1) (a "kill me" sign/a "kill me" sign/a "kill me" sign/a "kill me" sign/"kill me" signs1) on (Player2)'s (back/back/back/back/backs2). (Player3) and (Player4) follow it.
* "Alas, poor tribute. I knew them well," says (Player1) as [typeA1] (cradles/cradles/cradle/cradles/cradle1) their skull(s) in [typeC1] hands.
* (Player1) (smokes/smokes/smokes/smokes/smoke1) (a cigarette/a cigarette/a cigarette/a cigarette/cigarettes1).
* (Player1) (needs/needs/needs/needs/need1) a freaking drink.
* (Player1) (screams/screams/screams/screams/scream1) [typeC1] (name/name/name/name/names1) loudly as [typeA1] (charges/charges/charges/charges/charge1) into a fight among (Player2), (Player3), (Player4), (Player5), and (Player6), getting [typeD1] killed.
* (Player1) (does/does/does/does/do1) a comedy routine, with (Player2), (Player3), (Player4), (Player5), and (Player6) as the audience.
* (Player1) (goes/goes/goes/goes/go1) rafting, but (falls/falls/falls/falls/fall1) down a waterfall and into some jagged rocks.

TVT Reboot Events (14)

* (Player1) (announces/announces/announces/announces/announce1) to (Player2), (Player3), (Player4), and (Player5) that (Player6) (has/has/has/has/have6) (a rash/a rash/a rash/a rash/rashes6) in (a very embarrassing place/a very embarrassing place/a very embarrassing place/a very embarrassing place/very embarrassing places6). (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)
* (Player1) (discovers/discovers/discovers/discovers/discover1) that [typeA1] can shapeshift.
* (Player1) accidentally (covers/covers/covers/covers/cover1) the lens while taking a picture of (Player2).
* (Player1) deliberately (covers/covers/covers/covers/cover1) the lens while taking a picture of (Player2).
* (Player1) (sneaks/sneaks/sneaks/sneaks/sneak1) up on (Player2) while [typeA2] (is/is/are/is/are2) playing in the ball pit and (stabs/stabs/stabs/stabs/stab1) [typeB2] in the (back/back/back/back/backs2).
* (Player1) (reads/reads/reads/reads/read1) aloud [typeC1] shipfic about (Player2) and (Player3) to (Player4) and (Player5), who were forced to listen to it. (blacklisted) (Adventure Time)
* After getting into a heated argument, (Player1) and (Player2) agree not to speak to each other again.
* (Player1) (wishes/wishes/wishes/wishes/wish1) that (Player2) (was/was/was/was/were2) dead.
* (Player1) (wishes/wishes/wishes/wishes/wish1) that (Player2) (was/was/was/was/were2) dead, and (Player3) (grants/grants/grants/grants/grant1) just that. (Only P3 kills P2)
* (Player1) (wishes/wishes/wishes/wishes/wish1) that (Player2) (was/was/was/was/were2) dead, and the latter promptly (dies/dies/dies/dies/die1) naturally. (indirect kill, so don't mark P1 as the killer)
* (Player1) (calls/calls/calls/calls/call1) (Player2) by [typeC2] embarrassing (nickname/nickname/nickname/nickname/nicknames2), who (replies/replies/replies/replies/reply2), "Do not call (me/me/me/me/us2) (that/that/that/that/those2), (Player1). You pathetic (whelp/whelp/whelp/whelp/whelps1)." (Undertale)
* (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/try1) to give (Player2) a piggyback ride, but (is/is/is/is/are1) crushed by (Player2)'s weight. (P2 accidentally kills P1)
* (Player1) (tries/tries/tries/tries/try1) calling (Player2) with [typeC1] cellphone. All [typeA1] could hear are barking noises. (Undertale)
* (Player1) (questions/questions/questions/questions/question1) how (Player2) and (Player3) are still friends.

TC Originals (2)

* (Player1) (calls/calls/calls/calls/call1) out (Player2) for not laughing at [typeC1] knock knock joke, saying it's the most basic of jokes. (Player2) (says/says/says/says/say2) that (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) the most basic of jokes. (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic)
* (Player1) (says/says/says/says/say1) that (Player2) (looks/looks/looks/looks/look2) like (a corpse/a corpse/a corpse/a corpse/corpses2) that (was/was/was/was/were2) just pulled out of a river. (Player2) (claims/claims/claims/claims/claim2) that [typeA2] (looks/looks/look/looks/look1) like (a cool rock star/a cool rock star/a cool rock star/a cool rock star/cool rock stars2) who just OD'd in [typeC2] own pool, and that there's a big difference between the two.

[wingedcatgirl]

Also, our event dump for the season:

Events!

1. (Player1) (faces/faces/faces/faces/face1) a terrifying amalgam of all of [typeC1] nominator's past tributes! [TypeA1] (flees/flees/flee/flees/flee1) in terror.
   
2. (Player1) (faces/faces/faces/faces/face1)a terrifying amalgam of all of [typeC1] nominator's past tributes! [TypeA1] (manages/manages/manage/manages/manage1) to destroy it, somehow.
   
3. (Player1) (faces/faces/faces/faces/face1)a terrifying amalgam of all of [typeC1] nominator's past tributes! [TypeA1] (fights/fights/fight/fights/fight1) it, but it kills [typeB1].
   
4. To demonstrate the power of FlexSeal, (Player1) (saws/saws/saws/saws/saw1) (Player2) in half. The FlexSeal manages to hold (Player2) together for the rest of the season.
   
5. To demonstrate the power of FlexSeal, (Player1) (saws/saws/saws/saws/saw1) (Player2) in half, but (Player2) (dies/dies/dies/dies/die2) of blood loss before being taped back together.
   
6. (Player1) (unmasks/unmasks/unmasks/unmasks/unmask1) (Player2), revealing [typeC2] true identity! ... It's just (Player2) again???
   
7. (Player1) (spies/spies/spies/spies/spy1) on (Player2) at (Player3)'s request. (Player2) (blows/blows/blows/blows/blow2) [typeB1] up with a bomb, for which (Player3) (punches/punches/punches/punches/punch3) [typeB2] to death.
   
8. (Player1), (Player2), (Player3), and (Player4) die in a big fight, but (Player5) (throws/throws/throws/throws/throw5) a random object into the sky and (shouts/shouts/shouts/shouts/shout5) the name of [typeC5] source material, resurrecting them all with magic bugs.
   
9. (Player1) (puts/puts/puts/puts/put1) (Player2), (Player3), (Player4), (Player5), and (Player6) on the points of a pentacle in an attempt to summon (Player7).
   
10. (Player1) (hears/hears/hears/hears/hear1) it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hari Kiri Rock. (Player1) (needs/needs/needs/needs/need1) scissors! 61!
    
11. (Player1) (references/references/references/references/reference1) That Thing You Like.
    
12. (Player1) (references/references/references/references/reference1) Some Thing You've Never Heard Of.
    
13. (Player1) (goes/goes/goes/goes/go1) meta and (references/references/references/references/reference1) the fact of referencing itself.
    
14. "(Player1) (unleashes/unleashes/unleashes/unleashes/unleash1) a powerful attack, obliterating (Player2)!" (Player3) (narrates/narrates/narrates/narrates/narrate3) as [typeA3] (plays/plays/play/plays/play3) with [typeC3] (Player1) and (Player2) dolls.
    
15. (Player1) (has/has/has/has/have1) a bad cold and (chugs/chugs/chugs/chugs/chug1) cough syrup and energy drink. A blink later, [typeA1]'(s/s/re/s/re) standing over (Player2)'s dead body and (doesn't/doesn't/don't/doesn't/don't1) know why.
    
16. Look at (Player1)! [TypeA1]'(s/s/re/s/re1) (a/a/a/a/some1) cat(boy/girl/folk/folk/folk1)! Nya nya nya!
    
17. (Player1) (rates/rates/rates/rates/rate1) (Player2): 8/10 too much (Player3).
    
18. (Player1) (kills/kills/kills/kills/kill1) (Player2) in an attempt to earn (Player3)'s freedom. (Player3) didn't want this and (has/has/has/has/have3) a tearful breakdown.
    
19. As a specimen, yes, (Player1) (is/is/is/is/are1) intimidating!
    
20. (Player1) (eats/eats/eats/eats/eat1) a lemon and dies. Probably because it was a lemon car.
    
21. (Player1) (surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surround1) [typeD1] with [typeC1] Z-Power! (Player1) (unleashs/unleashs/unleashs/unleashs/unleash1) [typeC1] full-force Z-Move! (Player1)'s Attack increased! (Player1)'s Defense increased! (Player1)'s Special Attack increased! (Player1)'s Special Defense increased! (Player1)'s Speed increased!
    
22. (Player1) (surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surround1) [typeD1] with [typeC1] Z-Power! (Player1) (unleashs/unleashs/unleashs/unleashs/unleash1) [typeC1] full-force Z-Move! A critical hit! It's super effective! (Player2) dies!
    
23. (Player1) (surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surrounds/surround1) [typeD1] with [typeC1] Z-Power! (Player1) (unleashes/unleashes/unleashes/unleashes/unleash1) [typeC1] full-force Z-Move! But it failed!
    
24. (Player1) with [typeC1] crazy explanations, (Player2) is gonna need [typeC2] medication, when [typeA2] (hears/hears/hear/hears/hear2) (Player1)'s lame exaggerations there'll be trouble in town tonight~!
    
25. (Player1) would have been killed by (Player2) just then, but [typeA1] (has/has/have/has/have1) been cursed by god and [typeC1] work is never finished.
    
26. Years ago, (Player1) and (Player2) went down alleyways. This technique was called a walk.
    
27. (Player1) (coins/coins/coins/coins/coin1) a new word for [typeC1] conlang that means "change a creative work and unintentionally make it worse".
    
28. (Player1): "My blood! (Player2) punched out ALL MY BLOOD!" Somehow [typeA1] (survives/survives/survive/survives/survive1) this.
    
29. (Player1): "My blood! (Player2) punched out ALL MY BLOOD!" [TypeA1] soon (dies/dies/die/dies/die1) of blood loss.
    
30. (Player1) rates a film (Player2) just made. [TypeA1] (gives/gives/give/gives/give1) it a negative review. RottenTomatoes erroneously categorizes it as "Fresh".
    

Surprised we had exactly 30, we didn't actually count til just now. 85% sure we got all the formatting errors in there, too. (We or awe should probably updoot his text helper to make clearer the difference between "[nonbinary person's name] is" and "they are" situations...)