[Roleplay - Drop-in] GET THAT PIZZA!: REBAKED

[wingedcatgirl]

A mob of bomb-throwing anarchists shows up! They throw Molotov cocktails at Elliot's building until it burns to the ground.

Sylvi, bemused by this entirely irrelevant development which is definitely not at all the result of being  'd, casually yoinks the pizza out of Matthew's hands and vanishes in a poof of smoke.

[SapphireStarblazer]

After Elliot regenerated himself and looked at the ruins of his poor criminal empire, he still at least gets the police to arrest at least a few of the anarchists.  He also independently finds Sylvi, pokes her, catching her off-guard, and takes the pizza for himself as he casually flies back to an underground bunker.

[Cassie]

Libre turns out to be in the bunker, and wails at Elliot, causing the pizza to fall off and go missing.

[josh6243]

In the commotion, Commander Yammark steals the pizza, but [redacted] happens. Whoever caused it is unknown, but the next person receives the pizza in the mail. How lucky of then!

[wmradar]

Wm had spent the past 15 hours concocting a complicated scheme involving costumes, conventions, and concrete, when the pizza suddenly arrives in the mail.

DAMMIT! THIS IS GONNA THROW A WRENCH IN THE WHOLE THING!

Never mind how the scheme was to get the pizza in the first place. First comes securing the thing! So Wm puts it in the safe in his house. Unfortunately, this is the worst place he could've put it, because...

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn burst through a wall (oh yeah) then uses his cybernetics to burst the safe open and steal the pizza. But while he flies away he's hacked by...

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Wm coughs his head off before he loses consciousness and eventually dies as Matthew had actually seeped nerve gas into his house. He barges in with a gas mask on and grabs the pizza. He drives off, but he breaks suddenly as he sees....

Superjohn crashes hard onto the ground as Matthew takes the pizza, being incredibly pissed off for ninjaing him (JK) and as he drives off, he breaks suddenly, because in front of him is...

[josh6243]

Metal Shark Player, who buries him in scrap metal and anchors. Suddenly, it rains, causing poor Metal Shark Player to rust over before he could retrieve the pizza. The next person could easily snatch it with no trouble at all.

[Cassie]

Libre sits atop the rust, monching on the Pi-

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn appears with a steel chair and whacks him on the head 16 times. After that disturbing beatdown John steals the pizza, then hijacks a truck.

[josh6243]

But then the truck is forced off the street by a would-be generic isekai protagonist, trapping Superjohn on another world. During the commotion, Commander Yammark steals the pizza. But someone mugs her. Who could that be?

[Cassie]

Libre whacks Yammark with a peanut barrel stuffed with horse poop, and leaves with a shit-ridden Pizza.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Then a floodgate opens that washes away Libre to drown and cleans the shit off the Pizza as it comes floating to Matthew on a canoe. As he rows away...

[josh6243]

Marlinman comes out of the water and slices Matthew and the canoe in half with his nose. As he's about to grab the pizza, someone roasts him to death with a flamethrower. That person is ...

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn, having survived his Isekai adventure. He picks up the pizza from marilmans corpse, then goes back home to watch some pro Wrestling.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Matthew runs into Superjohn's house and bashes Superjohn's head through the TV. He slams John's head repeatedly on the desk the TV was on before slamming his entire body through the table. People find him later on and take him to the hospital. While recovering from his injuries, Matthew returns pretending to be a nurse by punching his leg and whacking him unconscious with a bed pan. He pushes John's bed out the window where he falls all the way to the ground below. Matthew snatches away the pizza and escape via ambulance he stole, but not before running over John's body on his way out.

[wmradar]

Wm, also pretending to be a nurse, proceeds to hijack the ambulance and crash it into a nearby ditch. Much pain ensues.

"That's for stealing my disguise shtick!" (note:Wm has not, in fact, copyrighted his disguise shtick, so this would not hold up in a court of law)

Wm, being used to receiving even worse pain from almost 2 years' worth of pizza thefts, shrugs it off and switches to a fireman disguise. Complete with jaws of life! He proceeds to spend the next few minutes slowly detangling the wreckage, so he can grab the pizza.

Eventually, he grabs the pizza from the burning wreckage and sprints off, just before the ambulance explodes. He then attempts to make his escape on bicycle when...

[Cassie]

Libre TACKLES from the left side! He starts beating up Wm before realising that the Pizza is gone...

[josh6243]

A note for Libre was left behind.

"Thanks for the pizza, suckers! From, Commander Yammark."

Commander Yammark is fleeing with the pizza, but she gets sucked into a painting a la Super Mario 64, leaving the pizza behind for the next person.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Matthew happens to walk by the pizza at this time and snatches it, but not before burning the said painting Yammark got sucked into, making sure she won't escape or destroy the world she's in, however that works.

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn runs Matthew over, doing it for the people, and to get the pizza. He then drives off to his home, but notices something wrong when h enters...

[Cassie]

Libre comes in and WAILS at his face. With Superjohn passed out, he grabs the Pizza and takes Superjohn's vehicle.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Matthew comes flying in on a fighter jet and locks onto Libre's vehicle and launches a homing missile that blows Libre's car to kingdom come and makes the pizza fly into the air where Matthew takes time to open the cockpit and catches it. He closes the cockpit and flies away.

[josh6243]

For some unexplained reason, someone painted a nearby brick wall to resemble the sky. Matthew's plane crashes into the wall, leaving the pizza behind. The culprit is a shocked Wil E. Coyote, who snatches the pizza. Before he could even flee with it, the Road Runner steals it. However, someone ends that bird's lucky streak. And that person is...

[Superjohn 2.0]

Superjohn, who planted a mine that killed the Road runner.

John grabs the pizza, then walks off while "your the best" plays.