The Magical Vending Machine

[PointMaid]

You get a Tesla.

I insert a poem.

[madface7]

The thing you recieve

It's five, then seven, then five

You get a haiku.

I insert a crazy hamburger.

[PointMaid]

...You get a Happy Meal where the 'toy' is a bottle of antipsychotics.

I insert a print of The Scream by Edvard Munch.

[Kennifer]

You get a painterly looking version of the Home Alone movie poster.

--

I insert a slightly used scratching post.

[artsyGeek]

You get a toy cat!

I inserted a real ass goddamn sword.

[Cassie]

You get a paper one.

I plug my midislap channel.

[madface7]

You get slapped by a MIDI.

I insert the trouble cube.

[PointMaid]

You receive a 'paradox!' error message from the vending machine and a Tesseract.

I insert a little clay figurine I made in art class when I was nine.

[NoahStratos]

You get a Golurk.

I insert a 1940s communication radio playing a sound clip of Patrick Star saying "FINLAND!" on loop, and two Suomis, the Tactical Doll and the sub-machine gun.

[Kennifer]

You get... a mecha starfish with a gun for an arm, painted to look like the flag of Finland.

I insert random.org.

[Despair's Archon of Memes]

The electronic number screen on the vending machine reads "1". When you turn around, you find that someone's fallen down the stairs due to the bad luck/roll.
----
I insert a speed bump.

[Superjohn 2.0]

You get a traffic cone.


I Insert my dignity.

[ThatIdiotMan]

You get respect.

I insert a broken dvd.

[NoahStratos]

You get a cassette tape that just plays a bitcrushed version of What's New, Pussycat? on loop.

I insert the treasure chest that Schezo Wegey sleeps in.

[josh6243]

You get Schezo Wegey's Mean Bean Machine counterpart: Sir Fuzzy Logik.

I insert a miniature copy of SCP-261.

[NoahStratos]

You get a costume of the Queen of Hatred.

I insert a Game Boy Advance and a DS Lite painted in the colors of UMP9 and UMP45 respectively.

[MadeOfMilk]

You get an SNES SuperScope.

I put in a cauldron full of mysterious liquid.

[Guma]

You get a cauldron full of mysterious solids. What are they, exactly? It's a mystery.

I insert a white glove.

[josh6243]

You get a copy of Master Hand.

I insert a printed transcript of this very thread.

[Cassie]

Oh gosh, the machine spits out a crosslink, and it's giving you trauma.

I insert a Grappling-Hook Pistol.

[PointMaid]

You get a fully-functional Batsuit.

I insert a pair of snowboots.

[NoahStratos]

You get a pair of Flurry Boots.

I insert Nasu Grave and Shirakami Fubuki stuck in a Waluigi costume.

[NoahStratos]

bump lol

[Kennifer]

You get some kind of weird bootleg Smash game.

I insert Vriska's FLUORITE OCTET.

[a-boy-playing-with-rubiks]

You get 8 toothp8ts



I insert a bucket of water.