[Fin] Murder U Too - Endgame

[Kennifer]

"People who have a working conscience, anyway."

[Florien]

Kellensea's eyes are hidden by the tinted goggles, but it seems likely based on her body language that she rolled them the moment she heard the word "conscience". She launches into a frustrated, impatient tirade.

What's this nonsense about a "conscience?" People who aren't completely and utterly blind with jealousy towards me and my items, back me up here! It's quite plain the cookie monster over there did this deed! Can we hasten to the execution? Considering the circumstances, I have been REMARKABLY patient. Now, if you ALL could be so good as to at least humor me in this, we could get this over with and get to the part where you're all fawning over me for saving the day? So PLEASE, can we all just accept the conclusions I've drawn at face value for once and always? Unless the cookie monster has a plausible reason for all of the following, of: why it flushed the gloves, why it used the gloves, what the knife was for, why the gloves match the neck injuries, and why the only evidence found at the scene implicates it, the cookie monster, I would retract my accusation. But what we've established is that the monster certainly DID go to the kitchen last night, by its own words! So can we stop being hung up on beginners luck relating to neck breaking? Beginner's luck is not a discrepancy! If anything, the blatant obstructionism by this Ranma goes to show that if ANYONE is working with someone else, it's him with the cookie monster! DO NOTE, everyone, since this is important, that this is NOT AN ACCUSATION OF COLLUSION BETWEEN RANMA AND THE COOKIE MONSTER, but a statement that the connections are less tenuous there than the connection between myself and Kai!

Kellensea slams her mailed fist down on the table dramatically, seemingly about to say more, but instead, she just stares at everyone, dead silent.

[artsyGeek]

"Uhm... How are you so certain about him being the killer? Don't you think that's a little... y'know, suspicious in and of itself?"

[wahoothis]

". . ." Ranma just stood there poker faced, just annoyed. "No, please keep yelling at us. That'll change our minds for sure." He spoke with just a mood of "can I go already?" "I wouldn't work to murder anyone. A man never takes anyone's life, especially with their skills. A martial artist should use his skills to protect the innocent, not take one's life." He said with his arms crossed, before glaring at Kellensea. "Just because he went to the kitchen, doesn't mean he's the murderer. But fine: Let's entertain the thought. His fuzz was found at the scene, along with the knife and in the gloves. Though there is one thing I want to ask him: Do you think it's possible for bits of your fabric hairs to fall off on their own? Or shed? From what I saw, the fabric I investigated looked frayed."

[Kennifer]

"She was pointing fingers at Cookie Monster even before half the evidence was found. Either she's got better investigative skills than she's letting on with all her 'adventure' talk and corpse looting, or she knows there would be additional evidence leading to him. Which could suggest someone planted it and she was in on it. I'd like to know which of these is right before I vote."

[Subparman]

Kai, after his dabbles in investigating, eventually returns to the room the others are in.

“Most puzzling. I was unable to find any other sources of the fabric, not even shedded parts of it around the facility...”

He examines the scene of the murder before continuing.

“As... reluctant as I am to put forward, I have reason to believe that the Cookie Monster is truly the killer. The lack of evidence is distressing, but had the fabric been planted, I can't help but ponder why the Cookie Monster never mentioned seeing anyone else coming to or from the kitchen, and I fail to see how Miss Kellensea could benefit from working as his accomplice.”

“However, there are still other pieces of outstanding evidence... Doug's shoes, and the unused knife. I... would prefer to make sense of them before we take any action upon our suspicions.”

[artsyGeek]

"...his shoes?" Haruka thinks for a moment. "Anything particularly odd about it, Sir?"

[wahoothis]

He looked at the househusband, who'd been silent this entire time. "Since when was his shoes brought up during the investigation?"

[Subparman]

“They were forcibly removed from Doug and stored underneath the bed, for... reasons I cannot determine. The dust marks suggest that they were handled with the gloves discovered earlier.”

[Kennifer]

"Yeah, what about the shoes? That's why you were in the room when I got there, right? Looking under the bed at the shoes? And what about what the vents, you were in there too, right?"

[Dookie]

“Kel? Is me the only one who thinks it is suspicious that most of the evidence was found by you? The gloves, knife, fur, all you.”

“...Shoes?”

[Subparman]

Kai nods at Alexis, looking thoughtful. “I'd heard the ‘body discovery’ announcement play as I first entered. As for the vents...”—he takes out a bottle of weird antibiotic gel from his apron pocket—“I have trouble imagining what Miss Kellensea would want with these, or the cadaver's belongings, for that matter. I found no evidence relating to the current inverstigation, however.”

[artsyGeek]

"Ma'am, Kellensea was the one at t... Hold on."

"Hey! Hosts! Can we still investigate the crime scene or not?"

[wahoothis]

No Cookie, you aren't. That's what Ranma's been saying this whole time. "I too looked under the bed. But I didn't see the shoes underneath there. Do you still have them with you?" Ranma asked, arms crossed, still a bit suspect of Kai and Kel.

[Florien]

Oh please, the CRAB found the knife, and Ranma the gloves. If anyone had the chance to plant your fur in the gloves, it would be Ranma. Now, I believe you'll find that you still haven't explained how your fur got into the gloves, and how the gloves got into the toilet. ELABORATE, why don't you? And do you or don't you shed fur? Wait, wait...

Kellensea listens to Kai's questioning of her.

WHY WOULD I NOT WANT THEM?! I'm an adventurer, I have the right to take everything and anything I need or want, and add it to the pile of stuff! And I've always done this, and will always do this! What kind of sad world do you live in where adventurers don't take everything that seems valuable, where they don't get to strip corpses? Has it no heart, no soul? Also, yes, this is the first I'm hearing of the shoes, what's with that?

[Subparman]

He raises an eyebrow at Ranma's comment. “I was under the assumption you'd seen me yourself. Regardless, by now they've been returned to where I initially found them.”

“...Mentioning past events, has Miss Haruka had the chance to use the dusting powder? If not, I suggest we attempt to examine the inside of the gloves, if they are still at all salvageable.”

[Kennifer]

"I mean, I understand taking medicine or bandages or something else that could be useful if you're injured, that's just playing it safe. Looting when the body's barely cold just seems disrespectful. But maybe that's just me. Either way, it's probably not as relevant to figuring out the murderer than looking at the evidence."

Alexis flipped back a couple pages on her notepad to check her notes on the investigation.

[wahoothis]

Ranma shot a glare at Kellensea. "I wouldn't touch those gloves. Not after they've been in the water." He said, arms crossed. "And I was mostly looking at the body, so I didn't get a good look at you at the time. . ." Which now he was a bit regretful for not keeping a keen eye, since he could've seen whether or not Kai was telling the truth about the body. "

[Florien]

What, you afraid of water? The great and powerful "annoying an adventurer" Ranma fears water? I'll keep that in mind. Anyway, I have yet to receive a compelling reason as to why we shouldn't execute cookie monster. After all, I trust that whoever found the string did good investigatory work to achieve that result, and didn't simply, say, burn down the entire room, pick up the ash, and say "IT SEEMS CLEAR THAT THE MURDER WEAPON WAS ARSON"... based on a true story of course. Loosely.

[artsyGeek]

"I still had them, and I still haven't used them. So yeah, I do have the fingerprint dusting powder."

[wahoothis]

Ranma shoots her a usual stink eye. "First, I'll gladly accept that "Annoy an adventurer" title. Second, I'm not afraid of water. Just. . . don't want to touch it after it's been in the toilet. Have some sanitary." He mumbled with a humph, looking at Hakura. "Hopefully this'll actually work and give us something helpful."

[Subparman]

Kai says nothing at that, but gives Ranma a distinct look that seems to be judging his preference for “not touching toilet water” over “not sitting back and allowing murderers to run hogwild in a hostage situation”. Assuming it's still allowed at this point, he goes off to find the gloves or get them from whoever was holding them, then hands them over for Haruka to print.

[Kennifer]

Alexis... doesn't think much of this, since she knows a lot of people are overly concerned about germs and that kind of thing isn't always rational. She does write something down on her notepad, though.

[Billy5545]

Meanwhile, Rosa has been observing everyone in the investigation. She seems to have an exasperated look on her face at everything Kellensea said. She even thinks, "what even is wrong with her? She's not as bad as that Liberi, but she's so annoying and out of her mind."

[Florien]

Look, the evidence is quite strongly in favor of the cookie monster having committed this crime. The evidence is not much in favor of a coverup. The evidence points to no other people. The only reason you refuse to see this is because I am the one presenting it. If anyone else had presented the same evidence, I move that the cookie monster would have been hung a long time ago. Now, under normal circumstances, I would threaten your families and friends, but seeing as that would be hollow, as I cannot access them, I will instead make this offer. Come up with one COMPELLING reason cookie monster could not have done this. I don't mean reasons like "oh, but he's soft and flabby" or "I don't think he did", I mean reasons like "I was spying on him the whole night and he didn't murder anyone." Or, "I did it and framed him." If you can come up with one compelling reason, any of you, why the cookie monster could NOT have done this, and then perhaps even framed himself for the murder, I will allow the conversation to take a turn in that direction. Is that acceptable to you?