01-06-2023, 23:40:42 PM
Tina Belcher's Directorial Debut!
- A cackling villain has just tied your friend/love interest/etc to train tracks and a train is barreling down on them. How do you save them - and make it look like you're a last minute hero for our film?
"Uhhhhhh! Jimmy Junior, no!" Okay, whether this was real or special effects it was distressing. And the actor who's playing Jimmy Jr. in this really looks a lot like him. Camera is rolling, suitably dramatic music is playing, the villain is twiddling his mustache in a very fitting, cartoonish way.
Tina is already wearing cowboy boots instead of her usual high-top sneakers, so she just grabs a white hat and a pocketknife from props and rushes onto the scene. She's not about to let one of the other actors rescue her precious Jimmy Jr.! She'll cut the ropes rather than untie them, grab Jimmy's hand, and pull him off the tracks. Then since the music is still playing, they might as well dance a little, right? Wow, this guy dances almost as well as the real thing. When splicing this together she'll use a heart rather than the usual iris out.
- Uh oh, the sheriff doesn't like you and you're being strung up to hang for a crime you didn't commit. It's a big scene! Get out of this one and don't spare the drama.
"UHHHHHH! But I'm a hero, didn't you see me rescue Jimmy Jr.? With the music and dancing and everything? Oh right, I'm supposed to be dying." She'll flail dramatically for a while, then... Hah, she's still got the pocketknife, she'll just cut the rope and fall. Hopefully somewhat dramatically. Into a pile on the ground, oof. "I'm okay," she assures the audience as she stands up and takes a deep bow.
- Ok, this time you'll actually commit the crime. Rob the bank, have a shootout, and ride off into the sunset with the money! What are you going to do to keep your paint intact and the shot looking great?
Okay fine, the sheriff is determined to hate her? Might as well give him a reason. Back to props and wardrobe, and she'll dress all in black and put a bandanna over her face. And oh my god is that a gun? She hopes it's just a prop, or at the very least not loaded, as she grabs it anyway. Okay, what did that Mickey guy do when he held her dad hostage and robbed the bank? Oh, right. Hold people hostage, ask for all the money, yada yada yada. She cues up some fitting music and runs into the bank. "Hey! Give me all the money and nobody gets hurt!" She'll grab an actor as a "hostage" to make her point, waving the... oh god that better be a prop gun around to make her point. She sounds as serious as she can muster. Once she gets the (also a prop? who knows!) bag of money she fires a random (oh god that's not a prop gun) shot into the air and runs off to the cave, the dramatic soundtrack still playing. After stashing her "robber" disguise and the (are these even really props) gun and money she slips back around to the director's chair and shouts "CUT!"
"Uhhhhhh! Jimmy Junior, no!" Okay, whether this was real or special effects it was distressing. And the actor who's playing Jimmy Jr. in this really looks a lot like him. Camera is rolling, suitably dramatic music is playing, the villain is twiddling his mustache in a very fitting, cartoonish way.
Tina is already wearing cowboy boots instead of her usual high-top sneakers, so she just grabs a white hat and a pocketknife from props and rushes onto the scene. She's not about to let one of the other actors rescue her precious Jimmy Jr.! She'll cut the ropes rather than untie them, grab Jimmy's hand, and pull him off the tracks. Then since the music is still playing, they might as well dance a little, right? Wow, this guy dances almost as well as the real thing. When splicing this together she'll use a heart rather than the usual iris out.
- Uh oh, the sheriff doesn't like you and you're being strung up to hang for a crime you didn't commit. It's a big scene! Get out of this one and don't spare the drama.
"UHHHHHH! But I'm a hero, didn't you see me rescue Jimmy Jr.? With the music and dancing and everything? Oh right, I'm supposed to be dying." She'll flail dramatically for a while, then... Hah, she's still got the pocketknife, she'll just cut the rope and fall. Hopefully somewhat dramatically. Into a pile on the ground, oof. "I'm okay," she assures the audience as she stands up and takes a deep bow.
- Ok, this time you'll actually commit the crime. Rob the bank, have a shootout, and ride off into the sunset with the money! What are you going to do to keep your paint intact and the shot looking great?
Okay fine, the sheriff is determined to hate her? Might as well give him a reason. Back to props and wardrobe, and she'll dress all in black and put a bandanna over her face. And oh my god is that a gun? She hopes it's just a prop, or at the very least not loaded, as she grabs it anyway. Okay, what did that Mickey guy do when he held her dad hostage and robbed the bank? Oh, right. Hold people hostage, ask for all the money, yada yada yada. She cues up some fitting music and runs into the bank. "Hey! Give me all the money and nobody gets hurt!" She'll grab an actor as a "hostage" to make her point, waving the... oh god that better be a prop gun around to make her point. She sounds as serious as she can muster. Once she gets the (also a prop? who knows!) bag of money she fires a random (oh god that's not a prop gun) shot into the air and runs off to the cave, the dramatic soundtrack still playing. After stashing her "robber" disguise and the (are these even really props) gun and money she slips back around to the director's chair and shouts "CUT!"
Stupid doomed timeline...