01-26-2022, 14:01:11 PM
Pinky and Brain's plan
[*sigh*] Come on, Pinky. They think this is our mess, so we'd better help solve it.
1. Figure out a way to get into the archive where the lists of blocked websites and reasons for why they're blocked are stored without arousing undue attention.
If we must pretend we're regular mice for... strategic advantage... that is what we must do. We'll pretend we're regular mice and scramble in behind an employee when they open the door. If they, ugh, freak out, or there are no employees there at the time, we'll use the air ducts and the spaces behind the walls. Like ordinary mice. Blech.
2. Solve the mystery of the inconsistent and archaic filing system to find those lists. Somehow. And FAST.
I'll put on a blindfold and pick one at random! It's bound to be the one!
PINKY! ...Fine, one try. If that doesn't work, I'll look at the ones with no dust on them first. There are a lot of websites, and more are coming online all the time. The lists must be added to constantly.
3. Destroy those documents in a way that looks like an accident.
Do you have the cigarette and lighter I asked you to bring, Pinky? Oh, good, now let me just make it look like someone was taking a smoke break here and got careless...
[Pinky hands over the cigarette and lighter, but also takes one of the papers and starts nibbling] Mmmf, aright, Brain.
[Brain faceplams] ...Well, I suppose 'accidental rodent damage' works as well. And in this case it might be true.
4. Think of some way to hide the whole mess you're in or are creating when being inspected by Colonel Valdragon, to make sure no one gets shot.
The archive fire could be blamed on a low level archives employee smoking, of course. And rodent damage on the maintainence crew. But better to preserve those employees, who could be dealt with... harshly. Order everyone to move the un-damaged archives to a new room immediately and act like it's always been there. Which they will do out of self-preservation. The old room is cleared out and presented as simply being an empty room.
And if Valdragon asks about how we're doing with the edicts, well... "What, Colonel Valdragon? No, we've been debating which edicts are absolutely best for the Alliance, which is quite essential to do I'm sure you realize, and have only passed one edict since we've convened." Then show Valdragon the one Loylalist edict we've passed, of course. The rest, we've covered up the consequences of, haven't we?
[Pinky hugs Valdragon's ankle] We're so glad you're here, Co-lo-nel! NARF! We love inspections! So necessary!
1. Figure out a way to get into the archive where the lists of blocked websites and reasons for why they're blocked are stored without arousing undue attention.
If we must pretend we're regular mice for... strategic advantage... that is what we must do. We'll pretend we're regular mice and scramble in behind an employee when they open the door. If they, ugh, freak out, or there are no employees there at the time, we'll use the air ducts and the spaces behind the walls. Like ordinary mice. Blech.
2. Solve the mystery of the inconsistent and archaic filing system to find those lists. Somehow. And FAST.
I'll put on a blindfold and pick one at random! It's bound to be the one!
PINKY! ...Fine, one try. If that doesn't work, I'll look at the ones with no dust on them first. There are a lot of websites, and more are coming online all the time. The lists must be added to constantly.
3. Destroy those documents in a way that looks like an accident.
Do you have the cigarette and lighter I asked you to bring, Pinky? Oh, good, now let me just make it look like someone was taking a smoke break here and got careless...
[Pinky hands over the cigarette and lighter, but also takes one of the papers and starts nibbling] Mmmf, aright, Brain.
[Brain faceplams] ...Well, I suppose 'accidental rodent damage' works as well. And in this case it might be true.
4. Think of some way to hide the whole mess you're in or are creating when being inspected by Colonel Valdragon, to make sure no one gets shot.
The archive fire could be blamed on a low level archives employee smoking, of course. And rodent damage on the maintainence crew. But better to preserve those employees, who could be dealt with... harshly. Order everyone to move the un-damaged archives to a new room immediately and act like it's always been there. Which they will do out of self-preservation. The old room is cleared out and presented as simply being an empty room.
And if Valdragon asks about how we're doing with the edicts, well... "What, Colonel Valdragon? No, we've been debating which edicts are absolutely best for the Alliance, which is quite essential to do I'm sure you realize, and have only passed one edict since we've convened." Then show Valdragon the one Loylalist edict we've passed, of course. The rest, we've covered up the consequences of, haven't we?
[Pinky hugs Valdragon's ankle] We're so glad you're here, Co-lo-nel! NARF! We love inspections! So necessary!
Murdergames Characters
Frankie * Dr. Ruby Ramirez * Solanacae Bakersby * Sam Black * Selen(ium) * Reina Schultz * Dr. Francine "Frankie" Frankenstein * Lotta Schadenfreude
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