Hunger Games Simulator - Trouble Cube Edition

[KungFuCutbug]

TroubleCube Hunger GamesExperiment #080719-04 Simulator
Season 4

Objective
put 64 tributes from across dimensions into a reality-warping arena, challenge them to a battle royale, and determine the strongest by seeing who's the last man standing

Our Chosen Subjects / Backup

The Bloodbath / Backup

• The horn has sounded. Subject DJ Professor K has already received a breeze of good fortune, having discovered a backpack filled with camping essentials immediately after stepping off their podium.
  
• Subjects James Bond and George Michael seem to be setting up a betting ring of sorts, to determine who will be the most bloodthirsty of our group of 64. While certainly an interesting goal to keep track of, I... don't think money should've been brought into it.
  
• Well, well! It seems we might not need to prod these subjects, as they're prodding each other. Subject Stitch is encouraging Subject Cellist to battle strangers, as is Subject Jacksuo to Subject Ruffle. Ruffle does have a gun. And I suppose cellos make good blunt force trauma weapons...
  
• Subject Evil Jay Leno has fled from the Cornucopia! A smart, if uninteresting move—this stretch of the simulator is called the Bloodbath for a reason.
  
• Subjects Ford Prefect, Rose Cookie and Monika have formed a temporary alliance to gather as many supplies from the Cornucopia as they can hold. I'll jot this down for later in case any of them are responsible for each other's deaths down the line.
  
• Subjects Madeleine Swann, Mozilla Firefox, and Cherry have all fled from the Cornucopia, carrying with them... Subject... a plate of cookies? Wh... why is a non-sentient plate of cookies among our subjects list? Strange. But I suppose this corporation has done stranger.
  
• Hah, how fitting that Subject Akira Kurusu, codename "Joker" has discovered another backpack of equipment for setting up camp and such. I wonder if there's a talking cat in there.
  
• First blood has been shed. Subject Lloyd Henrick has just been spotted viciously brutalizing Subjects Korben Dallas and Aaron Prowler Davis, leaving them bruised, beaten, and almost certainly deceased. Hah. In prison, I suppose, you learn how to hold your own in a fight.
  
• Subjects Cookie Monster and David Byrne have both discovered a bag. Byrne wisely abandons it and searches for an unoccupied one—I've heard rumors that the Monster has killed for the prospect of getting apocryphal cookies before.
  
• Subject Pianist has fled from the Cornucopia! Scaredy-cat. ...Get it? I apologize, I shouldn't be making puns in my experiment log, moving on.
  
• ...did Subject Kinji Uehara just drop in from the sky as though he were Superman? How on earth did he stick the landing?
  
• Subject Stuart "2-D" Pot has fled from the Cornucopia! ...I'm running out of witty one-liners to put after these to avoid them getting monotonous. Ech.
  
• Subject Dio Brando has somehow obtained a lemon. He tries to incapacitate Subject Mariya Takeuchi using its juices—perhaps he watched one too many of those "(x) eats a lemon and dies" videos—but she remains unphased. In fact, she requests the rest of the lemon to be juiced into her mouth! Dio just decides it isn't worth his time and leaves. ...And I'm craving lemonade.
  
• Subject Garrett Bobby Ferguson has fled from the Cornucopia, with Subject Zim riding on his head! I almost couldn't see him given how small he is, especially in comparison to his mount.
  
• Subject Brolander has obtained a sword. Ah, swords. A nice, simple weapon with many variations, each with their own advantages and weaknesses. Use it well, Brolander, for you can't go wrong.
  
• ...You know, I would expect for people to know not to stab themselves with random needles they encounter on the ground, but... Subject Amelia Monty is young. I suppose children wouldn't know any better. At least she got something out of it—the power of construction! No, not creation, construction. Different.
  
• What was that noise just now? Oh, it was Subject Ichiban Kasuga setting off a C4 he had planted elsewhere in the arena. Subjects Rosa, Laura Les, and a Super Smash Bros. invitation we're all caught in the blast. ...Guess that explains why Ichiban didn't make it to Smash Ultimate.
  
• Subject Dado has jumped in Subject the CaaC and fled from the Cornucopia!
  
• Subject Dexter's Dad (does he not have a name?) finds an unattended jar of fishing bait. In his search to find a fishing rod to go with it, he finds Subject Robin Gibb, who had taken a rod from that same spot earlier. I suppose our next experiment will be to prove whether fish can fear these men, given one of them survives...
  
• Subject Sly has encountered the same group of syringes, the one Amelia took having been mysteriously replenished. He chooses a different one than she did, out of curiosity, and—...oh. Oh, now he's Godzilla, oh fuck, OH FUCK LET ME GET THIS UNDER CONTROL—
  
• Scenario neutralized, moving on. Subjects the 4th Wall, Kama, Kiyoka Maki and Yoshiko Minami have fled from the Cornucopia! (author's note: I like these long stretches of "runs away from the Cornucopia" events, gives me less to type) Hm? How did this pink sticky note get here? ...Meh, it's not important.
  
• Subject Raspberry Mousse Cookie approaches the Cornucopia, but is subsequently approached himself by Subject Bouffalant. Seeing the intimidating afro buffalo standing so near, Raspberry Mousse silently flees!
  
• Other subjects aren't quite so intimidated by the creature and enter the Cornucopia unimpeded. Subject Dylan Brady obtains a grim sickle, while Subject Nonthreatening Femetit Bob reaches out and grabs a collection of throwing knives.
  
• Subjects Heinz Doofenschmirtz—wait, doesn't he work here? No? Alright. Subjects Heinz Doofenschmirtz, God Arjuna and Leeloo have also formed a temporary alliance in a bid to gather more supplies. ...I thought we had learned to stop toying with anything even remotely god-adjacent following the fallout of Experiment #[REDACTED]-01. Hm.
  
• Subject Peko Pekoyama manages to successfully fend off Subject Kim from stealing yet another bag she found. ...Perhaps DJPK wasn't as fortunate as I thought; there seems to be an abundance of these bags and backpacks.
  
• Subject Bellflower Cookie has taken even more initiative than the Bouffalant and is actively scaring people away from the Cornucopia, namely Subject Reisen Udongein Inaba. Why a moon dweller that can shoot lasers out of her eyes is scared of a cookie is beyond me, but... it works.
  
• Subject Ami Monty remains unintimidated by the cookie and proceeds into the Cornucopia, obtaining a spear in the process. Do I really want to trust such a young child with a spear?
  
• Subject Trash Can—okay, this has to be a joke, why are there so many inanimate object test subjects here. Whatever. Subject Trash Can fights with Subject Beta Wooper to obtain a basket of bread rolls, breaking the beta Pokémon's nose in the process. ...Does it even have a nose?
  
• Subjects Whitney, Broheart, Bow and Amy have fled from the Cornucopia!
  
• Subject GIR is also prodding Subject Herb Cookie to battle strangers. Of course he is, he's a robot built to serve a colonialist alien and also just a general agent of chaos. I would've been more surprised if he was encouraging Herb to take a more pacifistic route.
  
• !aipocunroC eht morf delf sah ikazayiM oayaH tcejbuS
  

Day One / Backup

• ...Err... I just gave the list a look-over and... Kiyoka doesn't seem to resemble anyone from Zim's home universe in any capacity. Hm. Why am I surprised—he's notorious for his incompetence, it makes sense he wouldn't be able to recognize names and faces beyond a select few.
  
• Takeuchi is a real person, she has no source material. Unless Kama is specifically referring to the King for Another Day tournament, which... Honestly, that sounds like something Ichiban would be into.
  
• HOW DO YOU INTERROGATE A TRASH CAN.
  
• Note to self, ask the institute's administrator to buy a new vending machine.
  
• Bob seems to realize he'll be spending the rest of his life living in an MAE paradise. Ohhhhhh...
  
• Playing a game of I Spy in which one of the participants is a plate of cookies indicates delusion in all who participate. Kinji, Akira, I will submit you both for a psychological examination if you survive.
  
• ...ew.
  
• I'm surprised the CaaC didn't shoot Firefox and loot her body of the tungsten cube. "No girls, girls gotta die" and all of that.
  
• Aww, a group hug. One of those five is going to betray Reisen later.
  
• WHY ARE YOU SINGING CHRISTMAS SONGS IT ISN'T EVEN HALLOWEEN YET Ah, puns. A bit out of place given the current season (as in weather-wise), but...
  
• A remix created by an animal, made using the voice clips of over 60 people. This is going to be cacophonic.
  
• As long as DJPK is sustaining himself nutritionally, Bond, I see no issue with how he consumes it.
  
• I almost want to call axolotls the ferrets of the sea to begin with. Beta Wooper shouldn't be so cross about this.
  
• ...The bad thing about being the only medical professional on the premises is that I can't heal my own ears. Ow. Ow. Ow.
  
• Herb has tamed the wildlife of the Arena. A crowning achievement, to be sure!
  
• ...Dio. Dio, you are literally the main antagonist of two or three different JoJo parts. Have you forgotten? I will submit you for a psychological examination alongside Kinji and Akira.
  
• Last place, last breath. GIR attempts to kill Dado for beating him in Mario Kart, but Dado retaliates and the robot is destroyed. I don't think that's a healthy response to losing a video game, but... it's too late to submit the robot for a psychological examination now. If it's even possible to perform one on a robot.
  
• The one thing separating death and godhood. And now, the robot is the murderer instead of the victim. God Arjuna's murderer wasn't even another test subject. Is there perhaps something causing the technology to be on the fritz?
  
• #DoofIsntTheBadGuy
  
• Well, isn't Rose already... attractive? ...Heh. I apologize, I can't help myself.
  
• An a cappella My Sharona cover by 100 Gecs. I'm surprised that wasn't a thing before.
  
• My day be so fine, then boom, headshot. George Michael has a steadier aim with a sniper rifle than his looks would suggest. Monika was unfortunately deleted, and Leno sent back to hell where he belongs.
  
• A tattoo artist? Boring? That's the most reality breaking combination I've encountered since the [REDACTED].
  
• Hey. It's not my fault I had to go in and wrestle you after you gained super strength & indestructibility and turned into Godzilla. I see a situation escalating out of control, I control it.
  
• (does Seinfeld break the 4th wall at all?) ...Hm. Another mysterious pink sticky note, before I even wrote anything here. Strange.
  
• The bugs... how calming, they are. One of my favorite pastimes is to just sit by myself in the rose garden and listen to the—...why is he blushing.
  
• What emotions is this child suppressing that it created Ruffle, of all things?
  
• Wait what the fuCK IS THAT THING OH FUCK I NEED TO GET THIS UNDER CONTRO—oh. Oh, Lloyd took care of it. Good, good. Everything is under control. This is fine. Everything is fine. Everything is under control.
  
• How courteous. ...This will bite the Cellist in the ass later.
  
• Yoshiko, for your sake, I hope you're just memeing.
  
• Why do you have an entire conlang for that? Just make a slang term for it in English, or whatever is your native language. It's English, right?
  

Fallen Tributes / Backup
Dallas, Prowler, Rosa, Les, Mysterious Letter, GIR, God Arjuna, Monika, Evil Jay Leno

— Dr. Nichole Cordelia Nyquist, M.D.
MAE Robotics and AI Institute