02-04-2021, 20:37:32 PM
WJB finally shows up, ready to solve the problems of the day.
Step One: Lure a thylacine away quietly with meat, then strike it in the brain-stem area, putting it in a coma, then lock it in silver and gold manacles and give it to the vet for an examination. Surely it will be fine, if it recovers from the coma. Zombies don't die from comas, right?
Step Two: Use the kind of terrifying shit that only the 19th century could come up with, and straps a cattle prod to a long metal spear (with a rubber grip, of course), and zaps them repeatedly from a distance, causing them to have horrific muscle spasms. That's exercise, right? And if they get angry, that's just more exercise!
Step Three: Give the thylacines a bible. Maybe that will teach them to be more Christian and not murder people as much. At worst, they'll say grace before mauling someone to death.
Step Four: Think about what a good plan all of this is, and then wonder if it's Friday. Decide it probably is, and throw some fish into the enclosure, because fish don't count as meat.
This is the absolute best plan ever with no flaws.
Step One: Lure a thylacine away quietly with meat, then strike it in the brain-stem area, putting it in a coma, then lock it in silver and gold manacles and give it to the vet for an examination. Surely it will be fine, if it recovers from the coma. Zombies don't die from comas, right?
Step Two: Use the kind of terrifying shit that only the 19th century could come up with, and straps a cattle prod to a long metal spear (with a rubber grip, of course), and zaps them repeatedly from a distance, causing them to have horrific muscle spasms. That's exercise, right? And if they get angry, that's just more exercise!
Step Three: Give the thylacines a bible. Maybe that will teach them to be more Christian and not murder people as much. At worst, they'll say grace before mauling someone to death.
Step Four: Think about what a good plan all of this is, and then wonder if it's Friday. Decide it probably is, and throw some fish into the enclosure, because fish don't count as meat.
This is the absolute best plan ever with no flaws.
I am the They who says it!