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"Hey, I'm good too! If anyone tries anything during the night, I'll go like this!" Komaru pathetically chops at the air. "And they'll get one of these!" Now a very flimsy kick, trying to prove her athletic prowess.
"oh hell no, kung fu panda!"
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You're pretty good, I'll give you that. But I bet you can't beat Chuck Norris. I'm sure you probably haven't heard of him, but he's a fighter. One time, a cobra bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died. Can YOU handle a cobra?
I like bananas. They're yellow.
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"And even if nothing happened, I got some good information watching the screens in the Admin room last night. Even if a lot of it seems to have been Bow decorating her room..."
Alexis chuckles. She's not sure she'd be the best at defending herself, but she'd sure as hell try if it came down to it. And she's working on figuring out the other people here. Well, most of the other people here.
Stupid doomed timeline...
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Ranma was going to be nice and not tell Komaru she's a disgrace to martial arts with those pathetic attempts. "Sure Komaru. Absolutely terrifying with those moves." He says with a light chuckle, before raising a brow to Ronnie. "Probably? I mean, they're just tiny versions of hydra with less heads, right?" To be fair, he never actually defeated one, more or less distracted and fought it until it got sealed away eventually. But they don't need to know the context. He doesn't really want to mention to them about the schoolgirl outfit during it.
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You don't know what cobras are? You must live in a bubble or something. Did your parents shelter you?
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"I think Cobra is the bad guy from G.I. John?"
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Alexis chuckles under her breath. Whether that was actually funny or she just thought it was because she's a bit sleep-deprived remains to be seen.
Stupid doomed timeline...
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That's Cobra Commander, and that's G.I. Joe, you dolt! Hasn't any of you read any comics or watched anything on TV or movies? Were all your lives that sheltered? And I thought my family was bad. At least I had access to all of that. I feel for you all. Get the internet, why don't you all?
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"The opposite actually. My old man took me on a journey to perfect my skills as a martial artist when I was two. Took about. . . Thirteen, fourteenish years? Of course I know what cobras are, I've never faced any before in my life."
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"Hey, I watch plenty of stuff! ...Okay, it's mostly musicals."
Stupid doomed timeline...
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G.I. Joe, oh. I don't know many American comics..."
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Well, at least you're familiar with any form of media. Musicals aren't really my thing, but apples and oranges. But the two of you.... , he points to Ranma and Komaru. There's this marvelous invention called the internet, where you can use a computer or phone to search for any information that you want. It's quite useful. You can look up GI Joe or Jackie Chan or whoever. I can show you all how to use a computer sometime if you wish. , he says dripping with a condescending tone.
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"I know what the Internet is! Jeez! I just didn't look up G.I. Joe is all, I'm sorry!"
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"Well the internet wasn't around where I lived. Besides, I have no need for that stuff. I have. . ." He does a quick kick, kicking the wall some. "Martial arts. Besides, the internet sounds boring."
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Are you kidding me? The internet is one big library all rolled into one package. Anything you want to know, you can learn. And you do have libraries wherever you come from, right? It's this building where people can borrow all kinds of books.
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"Of course I do! I never go there unless they have any books about martial arts or any techniques I can learn." Seems Ranma's interests are. . . limited, to say the least.
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"... That's it. Once we get out of here, I'm lending you my manga. It's all romantic and sappy and super cheesy, but you're not allowed to say no."
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"The Internet is cool. I like looking up random articles on wikis and stuff like that when I have time to kill. Oh, and look up song lyrics."
Stupid doomed timeline...
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Thank you! At least somebody gets how handy the internet is! Think about this then, Ranma. You can learn all kinds of martial arts tricks on the internet. Whole world to explore there, ya know? I've learned so much stuff, like physical fitness, the history of video games, even how important water conservation is. That's why I only take baths once a month. Guess me and Alexis are the only normal people here.
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Ranma looks at Komaru a bit startled. "You mean those flat books Nabiki reads? Thanks, but no thanks. I'm not really into stuff like that, especially something that sounds so girly." He crossed his arms and looked away, closing his eyes stubbornly. However, he does perk up hearing Ronnie talk about the internet. The martial arts part, not the water part. Because gross. ". . . Maybe I can when I have the time."
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"It does sound girly! It's super girly! It may as well be coated in perfume and petals! And you're gonna read every single page!"
She puts her hands on her hips.
"And you'll read every word!"
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"Well yeah, water conservation's important, but a nice quick hot shower doesn't use that much that I'd go a month without."
Stupid doomed timeline...
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Hearing this, Ranma gives out a small laugh. "Are you kidding me? I'm a guy! I wouldn't be caught dead reading one of those!" He'd argue, his pride being slightly damaged here. "And besides, I don't need internet to check how much water I use. I know how much to use when dealing with-" His curse. Ranma went silent and cleared his throat. "Stuff like bathrooms and all that."
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I'm just doing my part for the environment. People complain about my BO, which I really shouldn't give a shit about, but to make them all happy, I use my Axe Body Spray. Ronnie sprays himself with it and gets too close to Alexis while raising his arm up. See? Don't I smell better? Though he really doesn't; the BO and the Body Spray making an actual obnoxious combination that's actually quite nauseating.
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"Oh, you and water. What's with you and water anyway? You're like a cat with water! I know it's easy to think there's an invisible shark in every body of water, but there isn't! I got over that, you can too."
"oh hell no, kung fu panda!"
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