Escape from Zombie Park Island

[KungFuCutbug]

[Pico wipes his mouth off, rolls up his sleeves, and gets to work.]

1. >build a rope ladder up the side of the mountain—exercise is important, even on a deserted island
2. >bribe the Smilodon into moving out of your way with the leftover salmon & lox from breakfast
3. >slalom your way between the ground sloths
4. >distract the bears with more salmon & lox from breakfast and, failing that, try to nonlethally subdue any animals that come your way with your bare hands

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Sorry, everyone. Got caught up with business again and also I was thinking about yesterday. But we'll talk about that later.

1. Skiggs uses his Jeep to get to the Mountain Station.
2. Skiggs uses the bloodied-blown up remains of Hifumi to feed and distract the Smilodon. A fat guy like that, or what's left of him rather, should be very filling.
3. Skiggs slowly drives past the Giant Ground Sloths and makes sure he's quiet so they don't notice him.
4. Skiggs uses his tranquilizer rifle on the bears to knock them out and make it to the bus station.

[Guma]

Build boat, sneak past, retrieve parts. That's what Rouxls did.

At last, it's almoste over . . . .

[artsyGeek]

1. Percy first searches for a jeep - that should give her more protection, right? She also brings some meat.
2. She then yeets the meat at the smilodons.
3. She then attempts to camouflage the vehicle and/or herself to go through this area safely.
4. Using the camouflage and any remaining meat, she yeets it at the bears, tiptoes her ways to the bus parts, grabs them (the bus parts), and heads back to the jeep to put the parts in the passenger seats.

[Subparman]

1. Climb the mountain with your bare hands like a goddamn Assassin's Creed character.
   
2. Throw a penny into the Smilodon's line of sight and sneak past as it follows after it.
   
3. Sprint past the sloths and jump over them like track hurdles.
   
4. Make friends with the bears and hitch a ride back with them.
   

[madface7]

"Oah, this is no' easy ta do when yer hung over. I swear to ye, I'm goona kill Dr. Frankie one a' these days. Ach."

[PointMaid]

When they return down the mountain to Base Camp, Dr. Frankie posts the scores on a giant scoreboard like the one tracking other team's games and current playoff ranking at a baseball stadium.

Isaac earned scores of 1, 1, 4 and 4 for a final score of 10. The foot-pedaled cart fell apart and the Smilodon was more interested in him than the piece of meat, but he did manage to dodge the sloths and distract the bears.

Bodybuilder William Jennings Bryan and his Cross of Gold earned scores of 1, 3, 6 and 1 for a final score of 11. Despite his training, he got tired and tripped half way up the mountain, spraining his ankle. The laser pointer works ok. He very successfully avoids the giant sloths. And the bears, not smelling anyone else near and not fooled by his bluff to bring in the US Army, are unintimidated by his Imperialist rhetoric, seeming to snarl back, "You and what army?"

Tavish Finnegan "Demoman" DeGroot earned scores of 5, 4, 3 and 6 for a final score of 18. The Sticky Jumper works, ladies and gentlemen!

Pico earned scores of 4, 1, 3 and 6 for a final score of 14. The Smilodon would rather have something… fresh. But the Short-Faced Bears, like Grizzlies during the salmon run today, just LOVE the salmon!

Mr. Skiggs earned scores of 5, 2, 4 and 2 for a final score of 13. The Jeep is the perfect solution. But the Smilodons, again, aren't distracted by dead meat, and the bears are too big to be easily tranquilized.

Rouxls Kaard earned scores of 5, 5, 6 and 4 for a final score of 20. Impressive. Somehow a boat gets him up the mountain? (Is it one of those sea/land amphibious boats?). He successfully sneaks past the Smilodon and the Sloths and Bears, and retrieves the parts.

Percival "Percy" King earned scores of 4, 6, 3 and 5 for a final score of 18. Not bad! The camoflage was only so-so avoiding the Sloths, but this time meat works very well distracting the Smilodons. (Maybe they're just hungrier and more tired this time and want an easy meal?)

Akatsuki "Akki" Iridie and Akira "Madarame" Inaba earned scores of 3, 1, 2 and 6 for a final score of 12. The penny just drew the Smilodon's attention to where it was thrown from, and they trip over the huge sloths. But the gigantic bears are now good fast friends! Aw!

[PointMaid]

I'm still waiting on Elizabeth.

[Dookie]

Elizabeth goes to do the challenge...but something's up.

A ghost is trying to fight into her.

She slams into a wall. 

"I....I...t...s.........happening..."

(Lunch break pause srry)

[PointMaid]

Dr. Frankie is very, very confused and doesn't know what to do. She knows zombies. Ghosts? She doesn't even believe in them.

[Dookie]

She gets back up. Her eyes are ghostly white. She's feeling...different, because it's not her in her body.

"Like, i'm so over this."

She sighs and starts:

1. Call an Uber.
2. Ignore the Smilodon, but take a selfie of it.
3. Just walk around the sloths, like, they can't hurt me that much.
4. Start a live stream as I look for bus parts, and tell the bears to go away.

[PointMaid]

Dr. Frankie is staring in concern at this, in the middle of tallying Elizabeth's score. ...Are you okay? I guess you look better. I suppose. Thanks for the help with the bus parts. I'll have it up and running by tomorrow, folks.

She'll have Elizabeth's score up momentarily.

[PointMaid]

And, Dr. Frankie posts Elizabeth's score:

Elizabeth earned scores of 2, 1, 3 and 6 for a final score of 12. The Uber doesn't come (you hear someone yelling, "How the fuck is an Uber coming to the island?!" when Elizabeth tries, though.). The Smilodon selfie was very ill-advised, even though she got out of there alive. Just walking normally around the Sloths works okay, they don't see Elizabeth as a threat or lunch. The bears really run away fast from the little girl livestreaming her search for bus parts, though. They must not want to get caught up in social media drama. Can't really blame them.

[KungFuCutbug]

[Pico just stares at “Elizabeth” in disbelief. How the fuck did she think calling an Uber on a classified, quarantined deserted island was gonna work?]

[madface7]

"An' people say I'm too hard on the bottle," Demo says while taking a drink.

[KungFuCutbug]

“Demo, she's too fuckin’ young to drink. Goin’ too hard on the fuckin’ bottle probably has nothin’ to do with... whatever the hell she just tried. Think she fell off her fuckin’ bed and hit herself on the goddamn head in her sleep last night?”

[madface7]

"Mebbe if I hit her again, she'll start thinkin' straight." Demo raises his bottle.

[PointMaid]

And you all have been accusing me of child abuse? Please don't.

[madface7]

"Arright, fair enough." He lowers the bottle.

[KungFuCutbug]

[Pico silently glares at the Demoman at the mention of hitting her again.] “Yeah, you better fuckin’ not. She could be one fuckin’ finger poke away from dyin’ on the goddamn spot, after all the bullshit she's been through on this fuckin’ island.”

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

You hit the girl, I'll shove the bottle so far up your ass, you'll be tasting glass.

[madface7]

"Woah, woah, Ah said I wasn't gonna do it. What the bloody hell's gotten into ya? Ya need ta relax, man." Demo tosses Skiggs a beer.

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

Skiggs catches the beer.

How can you expect me to relax when we got one more day of this shit and we could potentially lose two more people?

Skiggs says quitely to himself, Damn, Pico must be rubbing off on me...

[madface7]

"I'm thankful tha' I already don' remember that fact, mate."

[Mr. Lee Hammer]

All right... I'm sorry I snapped at you. I guess everything is hitting a boiling point with me. No hard feelings. And I hope we can get out of this place because let's face it: in these situations, it seems like the black guys here are the ones that always seem to die.